Bug's Bleat 3Q 05

The Internet Version of The Ed Sullivan Show "We never let the truth stand in the way of a Good Story"

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Location: Magnolia, Arkansas, United States

Married to the "Wife of my youth." Two great kids, a fantastic daughter-in-love and a super son-in-love. Four super hero grand sons (Ethan, our "miracle" baby is the newest).

Friday, May 27, 2005

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Dirty Magazines

Volume 7, Issue 21

Hello All,

A few timely words from Thomas S. Ellsworth, tellswor@slonet.org, http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor
Another person or list didn’t send this to me, nor was it found posted elsewhere. It's just a few thoughts about a holiday, which is special to me. It's one of those few times when I share something serious instead of humorous. -Tom

GCF: Memorial Day 2005

The joke for today has been sent. I want to be serious for a moment and talk about the holiday, which will be celebrated here in the United States on Monday.

Memorial Day is on the last Monday in May and honors those men and women who lost their lives serving their country. What we celebrate as Memorial Day today began at the end of the Civil War. Family members of the many soldiers slain in battle would visit the gravesites of their fallen relatives or friends and decorate the graves with flowers.

On May 5, 1868, General John Logan proclaimed this day a holiday through his General Order No. 11. The day was entitled Decoration Day and was first observed on May 30, 1868. The northern states celebrated this day every year, but the southern states celebrated a day similar to this on a different day until sometime after World War I.

In 1882, the name Decoration day was changed to Memorial Day, and in 1971, Memorial Day was declared a national holiday to be held on the last Monday of May every year. Over the years it has come to serve as a day to remember all U.S. men and women killed or missing in action in all wars.

I am truly grateful for the freedoms, which we enjoy today. Too often, we take these gifts for granted, little realizing the sacrifice, which was involved in ensuring that these freedoms continue to be a part of all of our lives. Be honest, how many of us think of Memorial Day as just another chance for a three-day weekend? A chance to go the lakes or beaches or mountains? A trip to Disneyland or Six Flags or some other amusement park?

If you are here in the United States, please remember to display the flag, not just for the day but for the whole weekend. Let's not forget the real reason for having this holiday. The quote below says it all. Please take the time to read it.

Take care everyone.

Tom
(HM2, USN 65-69)

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"It is, in a way, an odd thing to honor those who died in defense of our country in wars far away. The imagination plays a trick. We see these soldiers in our mind as old and wise. We see them as something like the Founding Fathers, grave and gray-haired. But most of them were boys when they died, they gave up two lives -- the one they were living and the one they would have lived. When they died, they gave up their chance to be husbands and fathers and grandfathers. They gave up their chance to be revered old men. They gave up everything for their county, for us. All we can do is remember."

-- Ronald Wilson Reagan
Remarks at Veteran's Day ceremony, Arlington National Cemetery
Arlington, Virginia, November 11, 1985

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One final thought...

A ways back, I received an email from James Groth Olson. It was a poem he wrote and tells a story that he felt people needed to hear. I agree with him. Here is what he wrote:

EACH A FORGOTTEN SOUL


Some may not, but some will know
What it's like to lose the soul
Of a friend with whom you talked
Of a friend no more to walk.
For how to walk when you lie dead
In your final earthly bed?
He fought with pride and courage unmatched;
Still, onto him death's finger latched.
He was a soldier, brave and bold,
But now his story goes untold.
For when he died, along with others,
He was not recognized by brothers.
They were sad, all feeling down;
Their faces frozen in a frown.
For they knew somewhere at home
A little one, whose hair he'd combed,
A wife and kids, they'd go untold
Of this man's death, though brave and bold.
For unknown goes his name and place
In this evil human race.
He was laid in an unknown grave,
Even though he'd died so brave.
And many more so much like he
Are left behind by you and me.
They all add up, and disappear.
No talk of them, no listening ears.
Each soul forgotten, no more known,
Only dates upon a stone.
Look them up, but you won't find
Anything, not peace of mind.
For they are dead. Forever lost.
This is what your freedom cost.


James, thank you for sharing that. Over the years the meaning of Memorial Day has faded too much from the public consciousness. From a solemn day of mourning, remembrance, and honor to the men and women who died in providing the freedoms we enjoy, it has been reduced to a weekend of BBQ's, shopping bargains and beaches where only token nods toward our honored dead is given, if at all. Too many don't know what the day stands for. Thanks again for sharing and a special thank you to all those who made the ultimate sacrifice. You are remembered in all our prayers. And a heartfelt Semper Fi from this Hospital Corpsman to all the Marines I knew.
~~~~~
One of the main reasons we didn’t get “Da Bleat” out last week was the Magnolia Blossom Festival & World Championship Steak Cook-Off. We spent Friday the 20th preparing 12 of our photos to enter in the show, then we got to the square early the next morning to stake out a prime spot under the Magnolia trees to display our work.
This was one of the best Blossom Festivals ever. Lots of people, a huge parade, vendors of all sorts of wares, great steaks and, of course, some great art. All this in spite of the fact it was in the high 90s temperature and humidity wise.
After a day spent in the heat on the square, Annette and I served steaks for the Albemarle team and then retreated under the trees to enjoy ours. By the time we got home, there wasn’t any energy left for ANYTHING else.
I, like many Magnolians, am still peeling where my skin was sunburned that day.
~
By the way, I can’t recommend the SAU art program. SAU instructors were judges at the art show and, since I didn’t win anything, they obviously don’t have an eye for art.
Well ... maybe they’re not completely clueless. Glenn Wooten was displaying his work next to mine and two of his paintings correctly won.
~~~~~
We really enjoyed Vanessa, Jimmy and Josiah staying with us last week. I couldn’t have showed my photos without their help.
~~~~~
Terry Stockdale, one of our favorite “Bloggers” and computer Guru, shared a new utility with us;

I've been using a neat utility called StumbleUpon to find websites that interest me. StumbleUpon (www.stumbleupon.com) is a toolbar that installs on Internet Explorer, Firefox and Mozilla on the Windows, Mac and Linux systems. You tell it the general topics that interest you (check the matching boxes) and click the Stumble button.

StumbleUpon basically works as a community-referral system. If you like a site, you use the toolbar's "I like it!" button to share the site with others. If you don't, use the "Not-for-me" button.

One of the sites I found this way is the "Murphy's Laws Site" which brings together the Murphy's Laws for many different groups and professions. Murphy, as you know, is quoted as saying "If something can go wrong, it will."

Here are a couple good sections from the site:
Murphy's EMT Laws
http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-EMT.htm
Murphy's Photography Laws
http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-Photography.html

So far, I haven't spotted "O'Leary's Corollary," which is "Murphy was an
optimist."
--
Terry Stockdale -- Baton Rouge, LA
My computer tips, coffee pages, forums and more: http://www.terrystockdale.com
My blog: http://www.TheNextWindow.com
~~~~~
We couldn’t resist sharing some of the “Murphy’s Laws” from the above sites. These are only excerpts. You’ll have to go to the sites to see them all.

Murphy's EMT laws

* Air goes in and out, blood goes round and round, any variation on this is bad.
* The more equipment you see on a EMT's belt, the newer they are.
* Examine all chest clutchers first, bleeders next, then the rest of the whiners.
* When dealing with citizens, if it felt good saying it, it was wrong.
* All bleeding stops... eventually.
* You can't cure stupid.
* If at all possible, avoid any edible item that fire fighters prepare.
* EMS is extended periods of boredom, interrupted by moments of sheer terror.
* Every emergency has three phases: PANIC... FEAR... REMORSE.
* It's not a compliment when Policemen say you're crude, crass & cynical.
* The severity of the injury is directly proportional to the weight of the patient.
* Schedule your days off to avoid working during full phases of the Moon.
* Never refer to someone in respiratory distress as a "Smurf".
* Assume every female between 6 and 106 is pregnant until proven otherwise.
* As long as stupidity remains epidemic in the US, you have job security.
* All emergency calls will wait until you begin to eat, regardless of the time.
Corollary 1:
Fewer accidents would occur if EMS personnel would never eat.
Corollary 2:
Always order food "to go".
* The Paramedical Law of Time And Distance:
* The distance of the call from the Hospital increases as the time to shift change decreases.
Corollary 1:
The shortest distance between the station and the scene is under construction.
* The Paramedical Rule of Random Synchronicity:
Emergency calls will randomly come in all at once.
* The Rule of Respiratory Arrest: All patients who are vomiting and must be intubated will have just completed a large meal of Barbecue and Onions, Garlic Pizza, and Pickled Herring, all of which was washed down with at least three cans of Beer.
* The Basic Principle For Dispatchers:
Assume that all field personnel are idiots until their actions prove your assumption.
* The Basic Principle For Field Personnel:
Assume that all dispatchers are idiots until their actions prove your assumption.
* The Axiom of Late-Night Runs:
If you respond to any Motor Vehicle Accident call after Midnight and do not find a drunk on the scene, keep looking:
somebody is still missing.
* The Law of Options:
~~~~~
And more;
Murphy's photography laws

* You are not Ansel Adams
* Automatic Cameras - Aren't
* Auto Focus - won't
* Long life batteries only last for a couple of rolls
* The newest and least experienced photographer will usually win the Pulitzer
* The nature shots invariably happen on two occasions:
-when animals are ready.
-when you're not.
* Same rule just substitute children
* when you drop a lens cap, the inside part always lands face down in the mud.
~~~~~
The Magnolia Sites have now made it 1-½ years without a recordable injury. We are setting the pace for the company. Keep up the great work, but don't let your safety guards down. BE SAFE!!
~~~~~
We were saddened to learn about the death of John Cochran's mother, Joan Cochran
~~~~~
Cody, Colby, Teresa, and I would like to tell everyone how thankful that we are for all the prayers and well wishes for our youngest son, Cody, this past weekend after a horrific vehicle accident. It is a terrible feeling to watch a loved one in a deep induced sleep not knowing if he will wake up the same person he was before the accident. With each passing hour our son got stronger we feel because of the prayers of all of you. He began to respond to simple commands and very soon afterwards was able to answer questions.. WE all knew our old Cody was back when he asked "YOU MEAN I FLEW OVER THE BLOSSOM FESTIVAL !" The attending nurses laughed with joy and said our son was going to be just fine.

THIS MIRACLE can only be due to all our prayers.....

To all our family, THANKS
Steve Savoy and family
~~~~~
The Brister Baptist Youth Group is sponsoring a Hamburger plate lunch from 11:00 am to 1:00 pm on Friday, June 3.
Hamburger, chips, dessert and your choice of drink for $5.00
For orders of 5 or more, Plates will be delivered to the south and west plants or plates can be picked up in the old Smitty's parking lot.
See Ernie Emerson (235-6619) or Buddy Kyle (235-6024) for tickets.
~~~~~
Every year, on the last Monday in May, our nation comes together to remember the men and women who have made the ultimate sacrifice in defending our country. We must all take time over this holiday weekend to remember and pay tribute to our nation's fallen heroes.

This Memorial Day, we face a changed world in the aftermath of September 11th. We are sending America's sons and daughters, mothers and fathers, to Iraq and Afghanistan. At this time, more than 1 million men and women have served, 1,500 service personnel have died in the line of duty, and 12,000 have been wounded. This weekend, our thoughts and prayers are with families who have lost loved ones, and we hope for the speedy and safe return of soldiers who are currently deployed in Iraq and around the world.

We have an obligation to take care of our soldiers who have fought for democracy and defended freedom. In Arkansas alone, there are over 276,000 veterans. I am proud to have signed on as a co-sponsor to the G.I. Bill of Rights for the 21st Century, which will significantly improve the lives of our nation's brave and deserving veterans. This legislation modernizes the current G.I. Bill, which has been in place since 1944 and was enacted to honor and assist our veterans of World War II. The G.I. Bill of Rights for the 21st Century will increase the benefits our men and women in uniform receive today, including healthcare, and will provide long overdue benefits for the veterans and military retirees who have already served our great nation.

No other group of Americans has stood stronger and braver for our democracy than our troops and veterans. We must celebrate, honor, and remember these courageous and faithful men and women. On this Memorial Day, we remember all of those who have given their lives in the name of freedom and democracy, and we honor those still fighting to protect it.

Sincerely,
Mike Ross
~~~~~
Don't forget ... "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular Mid Premium Diesel
Current Avg. $2.10 $2.23 $2.32 $2.25
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
~~~~~
Recipe of the week; Mashed Baked Recipe courtesy Paula Deen


Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 1 hour
Yield: 8 to 10 servings
User Rating: 5 Stars


4 cups frozen hash browns
1 (7.6-ounce) package butter and herb mashed potato mix
1 stick butter, softened
4 ounces cream cheese, softened
1 cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese
½ cup sour cream
½ teaspoon garlic salt
½ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon pepper
2 cups boiling water
2 cups prepared French-fried onion rings


Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Bring a pot of water to the boil and add the hash browns. Cook for 5 minutes and drain. In a large bowl, mix together the cooked hash browns, mashed potato mix, butter, cream cheese, jack cheese, sour cream, garlic salt, salt and pepper. Stir in the boiling water. Place in a greased 2-quart casserole dish. Bake for 35 to 45 minutes. Sprinkle the onion rings over the casserole and bake for about 5 to 8 minutes longer until onions are golden brown.
~~~~~
I heard Ray Ramono discussing marriage sleeping arrangements today. He said that he didn’t know his “side of the bed” decision from their first night as a couple would be carved in stone. He was doomed to watch TV for the rest of his life with a big toe in the middle of the screen.
~
Annette and I rotate. I get the side near the HVAC vent in the winter because I’m cold natured. She gets it in the summer because she’s hot natured.
We’ve got a King Size Bed, but that doesn’t matter much. If I dare to relinquish any space, it’s automatically seized by Annette. Many nights I’ve got up to use the bathroom and returned to find the bed completely occupied by my partner, sprawled diagonally across the space with all the pillows.
Somehow, these things never seem to be covered in the movies.
~~~~~
BREAKPOINT Commentaries
by Chuck Colson. - Prison Fellowship

Bottling Up Smut
Cleaning Up the Public Square

May 27, 2005

According to a new book, we have failed our children because we haven’t fulfilled “our function as guardians of their cultural environment.” The “American media’s obsession with sex,” says the author, “has gotten so out of hand” that “even the provocateurs are being provoked.”

Whose words are these? Chuck Colson? Jim Dobson? No. They’re the conclusions of a “provocateur” himself, a “staunch believer in the First Amendment” and a “member of the American Civil Liberties Union”—someone who opposes “any element of government control of human expression.”

That’s how Gil Reavill describes himself in his new book, Smut: A Sex-Industry Insider (and Concerned Father) Says Enough is Enough. Reavill has written for magazines like Penthouse and Maxim, as well as other even less reputable publications. Back in the 1980s, he fancied himself a “rebel” doing battle against a “stifling culture.”

Then he grew up. Getting older made him “put away,” as he put it, the “arrogance that delights in offending others.” And then he had kids, and that’s when he really came to realize that smut is what he calls the “cultural equivalent of second-hand smoke.” People who don’t want to be exposed—who work at avoiding exposure—still get it “shoved in their faces.” Instead of being content to keep “sexually explicit material contained and separate,” media companies, he says, put it in plain view where anyone and everyone can see it—kids in particular.

According to Reavill, “the boundaries of their world have been repeatedly breached . . . by people interested in making money and dismissive of all other considerations.” By way of example, he describes a day he spent with his daughter. Within “one hour of one very ordinary day,” his daughter was exposed to sexually suggestive or explicit materials on television, radio, and on billboards.

Even though he and his wife can monitor what their daughter sees and hears at home, they can’t catch everything, and they certainly can’t control the billboards or other public advertising.

You see, even if you ban all media from your home, there’s the chance that sitting in traffic you, like Reavill, will be treated to an X-rated movie on the DVD screen of the car next to you. Or a day in the park will be interrupted by a radio blaring Howard Stern at full volume.

While Reavill does a great job describing the problem, his opposition, as he puts it, to “government control of human expression” makes a solution difficult. What other than government action will cause people “dismissive of all other considerations” to restrain themselves? As the aftermath of Janet Jackson’s “wardrobe malfunction” shows, sometimes it takes the FCC threatening fines to get the networks’ attention.

Reavill writes about “segregating sexual expression from the public commons” the way it used to be, but he forgets that the “segregation” resulted from a strong moral code, one that our modern society has all but banished. So today, unfortunately, only the threat of criminal and civil sanctions can keep the smut peddlers from thrusting their garbage in the faces of kids.

It’s a good thing when liberals like Reavill see the light. Now we’ve got to help them understand the real solution: responsible government monitoring, on the one hand, and a reassertion of moral truth in the public square.

For further reading and information:

Today’s BreakPoint offer: “A culture awash in porn” by Rebecca Hagelin, Townhall.com, 29 April 2005.

Read an excerpt of Gil Reavill’s book Smut.

Gil Reavill, “Culture-Whipped,” National Review Online, 25 April 2005.

Hope Glassberg, “Sex Change,” New Republic, 19 April 2005. (Subscribers only.)

Amy Sohn, “A Laptop Never Says No,” New York, 30 May 2005.

Regina Lynn, “Put Smut in Its Place,” Wired, 13 May 2005.

Paul Harris, “Porn writer bids to save US from hardcore invasion,” Observer (London), 24 April 2005.

“Virtually Home Alone: Why don’t parents control their kids’ media consumption?” Wall Street Journal, 11 March 2005.

BreakPoint Commentary No. 031105, “The Mainstreaming of Porn: It’s Everywhere You Don’t Want It to Be.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 041013, “A Little Late to Be Squeamish: Porn in the Mainstream.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 040203, “Only a Matter of Time: Why the Superbowl Incident Isn’t Surprising.”

“Playing at an SUV Near You: Porn,” CBS News, 11 March 2004.

“Cell Phone Porn,” CBS (Boston), 23 May 2005.

Mark Gauvreau Judge, “Playboy at 50: Hefner’s Philosophy of Half Truths,” BreakPoint Online, 15 December 2003.

See BreakPoint’s list of resources dealing with pornography and sexual disorders.

Michael and Diane Medved, Saving Childhood: Protecting Our Children from the National Assault on Innocence (HarperCollins, 1999).

Ted Roberts, Pure Desire: Helping People Break Free from Sexual Struggles (Regal, 1999).

Copyright 2005 Prison Fellowship Ministries. Reprinted with permission. "BREAKPOINT with Chuck Colson" is a radio ministry of Prison Fellowship Ministries. Prison Fellowship Ministries may withdraw or modify this grant of permission at any time. To receive "BREAKPOINT" commentaries daily, you can subscribe for free at http://www. breakpoint. org/.
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
abnegate: refuse or deny oneself; also, to give up (rights, claims, etc.).
faction: a usually contentious group or party; also, internal dissension.
pallor: unusual or extreme paleness.
suffuse: spread through or over; to flush.
artifice: an artful trick, stratagem or device; also, cleverness, skill.
saturnine: gloomy or sullen.
lionize: to treat or regard as an object great interest or importance.
finical: finicky.
from Dictionary.Com
~~~~~
"The compulsion to take ourselves seriously is in inverse proportion to our creative capacity. When the creative flow dries up, all we have left is our importance." - Eric Hoffer

"What this generation was bred to at television's knees was not wisdom, but cynicism." - Pauline Kael

"A great statesman is he who knows when to depart from traditions, as well as when to adhere to them." - John Stuart Mill

"Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence." - Erich Fromm

"It is the weakness and danger of republics that the vices as well as virtues of the people are represented in their legislation." - Helen Hunt Jackson

we all suppose, that we could be rich and not behave as the rich behave, is like supposing that we could drink all day and stay sober." - Logan Pearsall Smith

"The most original authors are not so because they advance what is new, but because they put what they have to say as if it had never been said before." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
~~~~~
One of Joe Tudor's favorites: time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana

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GCF: Dirty Magazines

Emailed to me from another humor list (Marty's Joke of the Day) -Tom To subscribe to Marty's Joke of the Day, send a blank email to: martysjotd-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@egroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/ UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2004 before it was sent.
------------------------------------

Soon after being transferred to a new duty station, my Marine husband called home to tell me he would be late - again. He went on to say that dirty magazines had been discovered in the platoon's quarters and they had to discipline the whole squad. I launched into a tirade, arguing that many men had pictures hanging in their quarters at our previous post, so his new platoon should not be penalized for something trivial.

My husband calmly listened to my gripes and then explained, "Honey, dirty magazines: the clips from their rifles had not been cleaned."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Compensating Factors

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website:
href="http://cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh/">Subscribe|_/ )_______________________( \_||_/ )_______________________( \_||_/ )_______________________( \_||_/ )_______________________( \_||_/ )_______________________( \_||_/ )_______________________( \_|<> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
[GCFL.net] Hunting Season

It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up raring to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.

Jake asks her, "What are you up to?"

Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!"

Jake, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decides to take her along.

Three hours later they arrive at a game preserve just outside of San Marcos,Texas.

Jake sets his lovely wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her, "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot."

Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant -- much less a deer. Not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!"

Confused and frightened Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. And again he hears her yell, "Get away from my deer now!" followed by another volley of gunfire!

Now within sight of where he had left his wife, Jake is surprised to see a Texas cowboy, with his hands high in the air.

The cowboy, obviously distraught, says, "Okay, lady! You can have your deer! Just let me get my saddle off it!"

Received from K D Kribbs.
-=+=-
[GCFL.net] Mexican Jews

Two Jewish men, "Sid" and "Al," were sitting in a Mexican restaurant. Sid asked Al, "Are there any people of our faith born and raised in Mexico?"

Al replied, "I don't know, let's ask our waiter."

When the waiter came by, Al asked him, "Are there any Mexican Jews?" and the waiter said, "I don't know Senor, I'll ask the cooks."

He returned from the kitchen in a few minutes and said "No sir, no Mexican Jews."

Al wasn't really satisfied with that and asked, "Are you absolutely sure?"

The waiter, realizing he was dealing with "Gringos" gave the expected answer, "I will check again, Senor!" and went back into the kitchen.

While the waiter was away, Sid said, "I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico. Our people are scattered everywhere."

The waiter returned and said, "Senor, the head cook said there is no Mexican Jews."

"Are you certain?" Al asked once again, "I can't believe there are no Mexican Jews!"

"Senor, I ask EVERYONE," replied the exasperated waiter. "All we have is orange Jews, prune Jews, tomato Jews and grape Jews."

Received from Joanne.
-=+=-
[GCFL.net] An English Lesson

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.

19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France.

Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that

quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the

plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people:

Recite at a play and play at a recital?

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?

Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS: Why doesn't "buick" rhyme with "quick"?

Received from Familymx55.
-=+=-
[GCFL.net] 100% Texan

A kid and his mom were walking on the sidewalk in Dallas. The kid, being 100% Texan, upon seeing some cowboys, said, "Hey Maw, look at them thar men with them thar bowed laigs."

She said that if he didn't start speaking correct English, she was going to send him to a Shakespearean English school.

A little further along, they saw some more cowboys. "Hey maw! Look at them thar men with them thar bowed legs!" he said.

So, true to her word, she sent him off to a Shakespearean English school to learn correct English.

He came home several months later on vacation. As they walked together down the sidewalk, they saw some cowboys. "Hark!" he said, "What manner of men are these who wear their legs in parentheses?"

Received from Robert E. Hays.
-=+=-
[GCFL.net] Why?

Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

Why are there 3 interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do people test the surface that has a WET PAINT sign next to it?

Why do young women spend thousands of dollars on makeup to look older, and when they are older, spend thousands of dollars on anti-wrinkle cream to look younger?

Why do old guys with bad knees and bad backs buy low riding sport cars? Is it to look younger before or after the excruciating pain of getting in and out of them?

Why do women use gel and a blow dryer to give their hair that "just got out of bed" look when they had that look before they used the gel and blow dryer?

Why do people on diets eat potato chips and drink diet soda?

Received from Don Bell.

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– NEW! Go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20050124 to rate this funny from 0 to 5.
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Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List "A cheerful heart is good medicine!" (Prov 17:22a) Go to http://gcfl.net/mlfrontend.php to change your subscription options or unsubscribe. To email this funny to a friend, go to http://gcfl.net/emailit.php?funny=20050107 The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://gcfl.net/latest.php
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Thanks to Staci H Trexler via Bobbie McClellan

Computers / Cars

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times! as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Feel free to share this with your friends who love - but sometimes hate - their computer.
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Norma Rowe shared SOUTHERN WOMEN with us.

Southern woman appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl

Southern women know their manners:
"Yes, ma'am."
"Yes, sir."
"Why, no, Billy!"

Southern women have a distinct way with fond expressions:
"Y'all come back!"
"Well, bless your heart."
"Drop by when you can."
"How's your Momma?"
"Love your hair."

Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity.
Humidity.
Humidity.

Southern women know their three R's:
Rich.
Richer.
Richest.

Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach.
The beach.
The beach.

Southern women know the joys of June, July, and August:
Summer tans.
Wide brimmed hats.
Strapless sun dresses.

Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey.
Darlin'.
Shugah.


Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes.
Driving Miss Daisy.
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind

Southern women know their religions:
Baptist.
Methodist,
Football.

Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy.
GRITS.
Country ham.
Mouth Watering Homemade Biscuits.

Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Charleston.
Savannah.
New Orleans.
Birmingham.

Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform.
Men in tuxedos.
Rhett Butler, of course.

Southern women know their prime real estate:
The Mall.
The Country Club.
The Beauty Salon.

Southern women know the three deadly sins:
Bad hair
Bad manners.
Bad blind dates.

Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are forevah!
Now Shugah, send this to some girls who were raised in the South or wish they had been. If you're a male, you hug that Southern woman of yours and say, "I'm a lucky man!" If you're a northern transplant, FAKE it...We know you got here as fast as you could. Bless Your Heart
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter frefom Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.
Today's Clean Laugh

Break Even

Two men are in a bank when armed robbers break in.

One robber rushes the teller windows, one guards the door and the third bank robber stands in the middle of the bank and yells, "Right! Everyone up against the wall and empty your pockets. We want valuables, watches and wallets."

The first man jams something into his buddy 's hand.

"What's this?" asks his friend without looking down.

"It's that $100 I owe you" answers his friend.

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Checking Newbie

Her teenage son was having trouble mastering the fine points of balancing his new checking account.

"The bank returned the check you wrote to the sporting goods store," she said.

"Oh good," he said,

"Now I can use it to buy some stereo equipment!"

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Auction Parrot

One day a man went to an auction.

While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher.

Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the parrot was his at last!

As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk!"

"Don't worry," said the auctioneer,

"He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Bottle Drive

The Boy Scouts were out collecting bottles for a fund raising activity. One ambitious but nervous young man knocked on a door and a sour-faced lady came to the door and asked:

"What do you want, Sonny?"

"D-d-do you have any beer bottles for the Boy Scouts, M-m-m-ma'am?" he asked.

"Look here, young man, do I look like the kind of lady who would drink beer?" replied the lady.

"S-s-sorry, Ma'am," was his reply.

"W-w-what about vinegar bottles?"

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

*Eye Laugh*

"Coffee Break"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=50

"Texas Rabbit"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=51

"Mug Shot"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=52

"Body By Home Depot"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw228

Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/emapping.html - - E-Mapping It Out "When my husband Mark suggested an impromptu trip to Long Island's East Hampton, I instinctively reached for a map. Then I remembered; we no longer own any maps. They were soaked beyond redemption in a flash flood that destroyed our car during our last impromptu trip. We replaced the car, but not the maps..."
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Digital Camera Reviews - - http://www.dpreview.com/ - - At this website you'll find all the latest in digital photography and imaging news, reviews of the latest digital cameras and accessories, the most active discussion forums, a large selection of sample images, a digital camera buyers guide, side-by-side comparisons and the most comprehensive database of digital camera features and specifications.
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Launch: Music on Yahoo! - - http://launch.yahoo.com/ - - With this new media resource from Yahoo, you can listen to radio stations, watch videos and keep current with the music industry. Related site: Live365 Internet Radio
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World Atlas of Maps, Flags, and Geography Facts - - http://www.worldatlas.com/aatlas/world.htm - - This site includes a world atlas of facts, flags and maps including every continent, country, dependency, exotic destination, island, major city, ocean, province, state & territory on the planet.
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Fact Sheet: Landslides and Mudslides - - http://www.bt.cdc.gov/disasters/landslides.asp - - Fact sheet about landslides from the Centers for Disease Control. Landslides occur when masses of rock, earth, or debris move down a slope. Debris flows, also known as mudslides, are a common type of fast-moving landslide that tends to flow in channels.
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PBS: Mark Twain - - http://www.pbs.org/marktwain/ - - Companion to the Public Broadcasting Service Ken Burns documentary about author Mark Twain. This interactive scrapbook tells Twain's life story through a collection of texts, photos, illustrations, and clippings from his day. To begin exploring, click one of the chapters to the right.
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Disasters and Emergency Preparedness - - http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/disastersandemergencypreparedness.html - - From the U.S. National Library of Medicine, National Institutes of Health, this site provides links to overviews of family and citizen emergency preparedness, coping information, law and policy, and pages for specific emergency situations such as giving birth in emergency situations and emergency management for children and seniors.
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Free Public Records Directory - - http://www.searchsystems.net/ - - Welcome to the largest directory of links to free public record databases on the Internet. Find business information, corporate filings, property records, unclaimed property, professional licenses, offenders, inmates, criminal and civil court filings, and much more.
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"Most residents along the East and Gulf coasts don't plan to take even simple steps to protect themselves and their homes from hurricanes, despite the devastation caused by five hurricanes that struck the United States last year, according to a new poll. Fifty-six percent of those surveyed said they felt 'not too' vulnerable or 'not at all' vulnerable, according to a Mason-Dixon poll released May 9, 2005. And one in four would do nothing to prepare for a storm, even after a watch or warning was issued. Last year four hurricanes struck Florida within six weeks. They were among six tropical storms and nine hurricanes that formed during the unprecedented 2004 season. Hurricane Alex also struck North Carolina." - Source
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"People whose hearts beat too fast during rest and too sluggishly during exercise have a greater risk than others of dropping dead suddenly from a heart attack, a study suggests. The research, believed to be the first on sudden death in healthy people, relied on simple stress tests like the ones often given to people with heart problems. Experts said the findings don't mean healthy people should have routine stress tests. But they said that when heart patients get the tests, doctors should study the heart rate pattern for signs of trouble and not just look for evidence of blocked arteries as most do now." - Source
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"For men diagnosed with early prostate cancer, one of their options is to wait to see if the disease progresses and then to undergo treatment if necessary. However, in terms of survival over the ensuing 10 years, immediate surgery seems a better choice, a Swedish study indicates. The reduced death rate from prostate cancer for those undergoing surgery rather than taking a 'watchful waiting' approach is particularly evident among men younger than 65 years of age." - Source
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"Cardiovascular risk factors appear to indicate deteriorating renal function in all adults. Researchers discovered various indicators of heart or vascular disease can signal that kidney function is on the decline in the general population, as published in the May issue of Kidney International. While generalized atherosclerosis (hardening of arteries and blood vessels) has been increasingly recognized as a cause of end-stage renal disease (ESRD), a recent study of over 8,500 patients discovered that this same disease also affects renal function in those who do not suffer from ESRD. Together with blood pressure, age, and body mass index, different cardiovascular risk factors can have varied impact on kidney function. 'Studies show that the mechanisms underlying renal function abnormalities in the general population are limited,' states Paul E. De Jong, corresponding author of the study. 'As presently many subjects present with ESRD without known renal diseases, and the prevalence of obesity and generalized atherosclerosis are increasing, we need to know which factors should be detected and should be monitored under treatment.' " - Source
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"A battery with a lifespan measured in decades is in development at the University of Rochester, as scientists demonstrate a new fabrication method that in its roughest form is already 10 times more efficient than current nuclear batteries - and has the potential to be nearly 200 times more efficient. The details of the technology, already licensed to BetaBatt Inc., appears in today's issue of Advanced Materials. 'Our society is placing ever-higher demands for power from all kinds of devices,' says Philippe Fauchet, professor of electrical and computer engineering at the University of Rochester and co-author of the research. 'For 50 years, people have been investigating converting simple nuclear decay into usable energy, but the yields were always too low. We’ve found a way to make the interaction much more efficient, and we hope these findings will lead to a new kind of battery that can pump out energy for years.' The technology is geared toward applications where power is needed in inaccessible places or under extreme conditions. Since the battery should be able to run reliably for more than 10 years without recharge or replacement, it would be perfect for medical devices like pacemakers, implanted defibrillators, or other implanted devices that would otherwise require surgery to replace or repair. Likewise, deep-space probes or deep-sea sensors, which are beyond the reach of repair, also would benefit from such technology." - Source
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"Americans looking to shed those extra pounds should choose Weight Watchers International Inc. over low-carbohydrate rival the Atkins Diet, according to the latest issue of Consumer Reports magazine. Citing published clinical research, nutritional analyzes, and comparisons with U.S. dietary guidelines, the magazine best known for comparing prices and performances of cars and televisions said Weight Watchers topped the list of the nine popular diet plans it studied. 'A balanced, low-fat diet plus weekly meetings give this large commercial weight-loss program the highest long-term adherence rate of any diet in our analysis,' Consumer Reports said of the Weight Watchers program." - Source
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"As many as 98,000 Americans still die each year because of medical errors despite an unprecedented focus on patient safety over the last five years, according to a study released May 18, 2005. Significant improvements have been made in some hospitals since the Institute of Medicine released a landmark report in 2000 that revealed many thousands of Americans die each year because of medical mistakes. But nationwide, the pace of change is painstakingly slow, and the death rate has not changed much, according to the study in The Journal of the American Medical Association. The researchers blame the complexity of health care systems, a lack of leadership, the reluctance of doctors to admit errors and an insurance reimbursement system that rewards errors - hospitals can bill for additional services needed when patients are injured by mistakes - but often will not pay for practices that reduce those errors." - Source
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| Safety From The Heart |

Memorial Day weekend traffic fatalities and disabling injuries estimate.

The National Safety Council today released its estimates for traffic crashes for the upcoming Memorial Day holiday weekend which begins at 6 p.m.Fri., May 27 and ends at 11:59 p.m.Mon., May 30.

The Council estimates 471 traffic fatalities over the traditional summer kick-off weekend and another 25,400 disabling injuries from motor vehicle collisions.

The Council also estimates that 393 people will survive the Memorial Day holiday because they will be wearing seatbelts and that another 115 lives could be saved if all wore safety belts.

For the past six years, the Memorial Day weekend has averaged 8.7% more traffic fatalities than similar non-holiday periods.

The National Safety Council issues fatality estimates for major holiday periods to draw attention to the need for drivers to exercise safe driving practices especially when a significant number of drivers are expected to be traveling on our roads and highways.

To ensure a safe Memorial Day weekend, the National Safety Council recommends drivers:

Establish and enforce a driver's 'distraction-free zone' especially in cars equipped with electronic devices including cell phones, video games and global positioning systems.
Make sure all passengers are buckled up and children are in age-appropriate safety seats.
Allow plenty of travel time to avoid frustration and diminish the impulse to speed.
Drive defensively and exercise caution especially during inclement weather.
Don't drink and drive. Even moderate consumption of wine or beer impairs reaction time and driving judgment.
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:)
-- :) :) ----------------------------------
Volume 10, Number 60 -- 25 May 2005
Tourbus Home - http://www.TOURBUS.com
Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html
----------------------------------------------------
TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPIC: Search Engine News

Tired of the same old search engine? In today's TOURBUS you'll find reviews of some new Internet search tools with all the bells and whistles, and one to avoid. Read on!

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MSN SEARCH
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You may be surprised that I'm starting off a Tourbus article by recommending that you visit a Microsoft website, but here goes. Gates and Co. have come up with some pretty tough competition for Google, with the new MSN Search. MSN Search provides search for web pages, news or images, as well as interactive maps and access to the Encarta encyclopedia.

My testing shows that the relevancy of search results is excellent. Search for "tourbus", "copper fountains" and "send flowers" at MSN. Thanks, Bill! Those #1 listings are all my sites. But none of them show up in the top ten at Google. What's up with that?

MSN Search - http://search.msn.com
RELATED NEWS - http://www.tourbus.com/MSN-search-news.html

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EXALEAD
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Exalead is a new search engine from France that sports a variety of powerful search options that you won't find at the big name sites. Proximity searching lets you search for words within 16 words of each other, and not necessarily in the order you specify. For example, searching for "bob (NEAR) tourbus" will find a page containing "Tourbus creators Bob Rankin and Patrick Crispen offer lively, witty commentary." Wow, throw a little flattery into the technology and that's one tasty soup!

You can also search with word truncation, so "offic*" will find officer, official, officious, etc. Other search engines will do simple word stemming, such as adding or removing an "s", but this goes far beyond that. Can't spell for beans? Try the phonetic spelling and approximate spelling options. Much to my amusment, the phrase "rankine torubus" brings up Tourbus.com as the first hit when the approximate spelling feature is selected.

And geeks rejoice! Exalead does regular expression searching, which is an extremely potent (and extremely confusing) pattern matching doohickey. For example, /IBM[0-9]{4}/ matches IBM3090 or IBM8514, and /ex...s..n/ matches extension, expansion, or excursion.

Exalead - http://www.exalead.com
RELATED NEWS - http://www.tourbus.com/exalead-news.html

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KARTOO
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KartOO is a metasearch engine with a visual display. KartOO launches your query to a set of search engines, compiles the results and shows them in a series of interactive maps. In these maps, websites are represented by larger or smaller sized pages, depending on relevance. When you move the pointer over these pages, the related keywords are illuminated and a brief description of the site appears on the left side of the screen. You can refine your search by clicking entries in a subject tree.

One nice feature of Kartoo is the option to select a specific set of search engines for your query. The animated genie is a teensy bit annoying, but this search tool is worth a try.

KartOO - http://www.kartoo.com
RELATED NEWS - http://www.tourbus.com/metasearch-news.html

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VIVISIMO
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Why does this name conjure up images of an Italian wedding? Vivisimo wants to help you solve the information overload problem that occurs when you get thousands of results from a web search. By categorizing search results, they can become more meaningful and actionable. Vivisimo uses "clustering" to organize search results into titled folders to build a clearer picture for searchers.

There are several of these "information relationship" type of search engines available, and I think they are most useful when you're doing research on a broad topic, as opposed to looking for a specific site.

Vivisimo - http://www.vivisimo.com
RELATED NEWS - http://www.tourbus.com/information-overload-news.html

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KAXY
------

Here's one to avoid. Kaxy promises "Web Page Preview", a feature that's supposed to give you a thumbnail view of resultant websites, along with the search descriptions. But it doesn't work unless you download a plugin called WebSnap from Sequoia Entertainment. Does that sound ominous to you, too? My advice: Just Say No to anything that wants you to download a plugin.

Oh, and even worse, I found instances of apparent link hijacking in the Kaxy search results. Try a search for "send flowers" at Kaxy and look at item #5 in the hits. The description and address shown are for my FlowersFast.com site (#1 for that term at MSN), but the title and the actual link take you to 800-Flowers through a paid search link. Nasty! Want another example? Search for "website hosting" (also #1 at MSN) and you'll see the link for WebsiteHostDirectory.com actually takes you somewhere else, through a paid-for link. Doesn't seem like this is a fluke.

Kaxy - http://www.kaxy.com
RELATED NEWS - http://www.hotnews360.com/adware-hijacking-news.html

You may be happy with your favorite search engine, but are you sure you're getting the best results? Try some of these up-and-coming search tools and you might find they do a better job for some or all of your queries. That's all for now, see you next time! -- Bob Rankin

+---------------------------------------+
==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]=
The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238
Copyright 1995-2005, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved
Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html
Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the
Tourbus Website - http://www.TOURBUS.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ.
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TGIF-Today God Is First


The Greatest Test
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Friday, May 27, 2005
by Os Hillman

I know, my God, that You test the heart and are pleased with integrity. ~ 1 Chronicles 29:17a

God tests His children to know what is in their hearts. God's desire for each of His children is to walk in relationship with Him, to uphold His righteousness and integrity. It is a high calling that we will fail to achieve without complete dependence on Him.

The greatest tests come not in great adversities, but in great prosperity. For it is in prosperity that we begin to lose the sensitivity to sin in our lives. Adversity motivates us to righteousness out of a desire to see our adversity changed. Prosperity fails to provide this motivation for obedience. We fall into a satisfaction and confidence in life that is based on our prosperity rather than on God.

Hezekiah was a great godly king. He was a faithful, God-honoring king most of his life, but toward the end he became proud. God wanted to find out if he would still honor Him and recognize His blessings in his life. He failed the test when God sent an envoy to his palace to inquire about a miracle that God performed on behalf of Hezekiah. The test was designed to find out if Hezekiah would publicly acknowledge the miracle performed on his behalf.

But when envoys were sent by the rulers of Babylon to ask him about the miraculous sign that had occurred in the land, God left him to test him and to know everything that was in his heart (2 Chronicle 32:31).
Hezekiah's failure resulted in his children failing to carry on as rulers of Israel, and the nation would eventually be taken over by Babylon.

The lesson of Hezekiah is clear. If we are to remain faithful to our Lord, we must remain steadfast in our obedience to Him. Prosperity can be our greatest test. Ask the Lord to give you the grace to be a faithful follower during times of prosperity.

Copyright 2005. www.MarketplaceLeaders.org
---------------------------------------------------
To contact Os Hillman, request reprint permission, or to book Os to speak in your town write to os@marketplaceleaders.org. Marketplace Leaders Website: http://www.marketplaceleaders.org/ Copyright 2004
--------------------------------------------------
Please recommend this TGIF daily devotional to everyone interested in applying their faith to their worklife. Tell them to subscribe at http://www.TodayGodIsFirst.com

Os Hillman Copyright 2004
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Verse of the Day

And masters, do the same things to them, and give up threatening, knowing that both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no partiality with Him. (Ephesians 6:9, NASB95)

If you are a Rush Limbaugh fan, you know that “ditto” means, “I agree whole heartedly with what you (or a previous caller) just said.” Paul predates Rush by a few centuries, but in essence his is saying to employers (masters) “ditto” plus. Everything Paul said to employees, he says employers must do the same … and they have additional responsibilities. They are to quit trying to intimidate their employees (give up threatening). A master would likely threaten to beat a slave to within an inch of his life – or worse – if the salve didn’t obey immediately. In that way, the master controlled the output of his slaves. The only problem was that threatened slaves weren’t too happy about working. They did it, but not out of love for the master … and that was a command given to the slaves/employees in the previous verses.

Instead, Paul tells the masters/employers to treat their underlings as equals! That is something that is totally anti-culture to the slave-owners of the day. But Paul says Christians and Christianity are different. We live in a different culture … really, we create a NEW culture in the midst of the OLD culture. Christians are to be so different that the world stops and takes note of them. Bosses who look at employees as equals certainly fit that bill – even today. Few employers have created what can be called a “high trust culture”. It seems that the boss wants to keep the employees in the dark and on edge. Many businesses actually think that that is a healthy way of doing business!

Paul believes differently … especially for Christians. He reminds masters that they both, masters and slaves, have the same Master, Jesus Christ. He also mentions that Jesus is not partial to either slaves or masters. They are all equal in His sight. Remember the first half of Ephesians? What were we learning? That’s right. We were coming to an understanding of who we are in Christ … children of the Living God, joint heirs with Jesus. There is no degree of adoption. There is no degree of inheritance or access to God’s Kingdom and wealth. Indeed, all have equal access no matter what position they hold on earth. There is neither Greek nor Jew, rich nor poor, powerful nor weak, male nor female, great nor insignificant. All are equal to the Father because of His Son, Jesus!

In summary, both employees and employers are to work as though the boss is Jesus … because ultimately He is. Employers have the added burden of treating their employees right … like brothers and sisters … because they are both slaves to the same Master, our Savior, Jesus! To live this new paradigm, this new way of seeing things, will take courage, strength, and determination – all provided to us by our Master through the Holy Spirit. We have access to all the treasures of the Father, thus we have everything we need to be totally DIFFERENT in a crazy world.

To paraphrase Nike, “Let’s do it!”

Harley
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With good will render service, as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that whatever good thing each one does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether slave or free. (Ephesians 6:7-8, NASB95)

Sometimes English translations just don’t seem to get it right … even the best of translations miss it once in a while. This is one of those cases. The phrase in question begins these verses: “With good will render service …” Taken at face value in the English, it seems that Paul is saying something like, “Agreeably, render service” or “work agreeably” or “work with a good attitude”. The Greek word translated here as “good will” is perhaps more accurately translated “enthusiastically”, thus “enthusiastically serve or work for.” One dictionary defines the word like this: “a state of zeal based upon a desire to be involved in some activity or state.” The verse, using this definition, could be translated like this: “Joyously, looking forward to being a part of a great project, work …”

I suspect that few of us look at our jobs in this light. Then again, probably most of us don’t look at our bosses and see Jesus (remember the last session?) Think back to a time when you were really excited about your job (or some past job). What caused your excitement? Usually it involved the idea that you were doing something that made a difference. It didn’t really make any difference if the job was “world changing” or just “making someone feel better about himself.” When I was a furniture refinisher, that is exactly how I looked at my job. No, what I did wouldn’t win a Nobel Peace Prize for its great contribution to the world. However, everything I did made a difference in someone’s life. I may have been restoring a piece of family history – “that roll top desk sat in grandpa’s hardware store for seventy-five years. I’m proud to have it look so nice.” Or, I may have made someone’s life a little easier – “I’m so glad you could fix my chair. With my bad back, it is the only chair that I am really comfortable in.” Those were exciting days. I loved my job. I loved my work, and though it was hard work, it was rewarding.

Paul tells us that we should look at every job we have – including the one we despise right now – in that way! I used to tell my daughters, “If you have to do something, you might as well enjoy it. That makes the job so much easier.” Have you ever noticed that your attitude affects how long a job takes? My brother and I had to do the dishes every night. When I looked at it as a drudgery, it seemed that washing a meal’s worth of dishes took all night. However, when I looked at the job as an enjoyable experience, the effort lasted only minutes. It’s kind of like a roller coaster. Melanie hates them. I love them. When she rode the last one, she closed her eyes and the ride seemed to last forever. I, on the other hand, laughed and screamed and enjoyed what had to be one of the shortest rides ever. It was all in the attitude.

Paul gives us further incentive to enjoy our work. “… whatever good thing each one does, this he will receive back from the Lord …” Remember, we are not working for Billy the Boss; in actuality, we are working for Jesus! While Billy pays us in dollars (or whatever currency your locale uses), Jesus pays us in eternal rewards … and often in earthly bonuses as well! It all begins with enjoying our work … getting up each morning looking forward to what Jesus will have us do on the job today!

Harley
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"Slaves, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in the sincerity of your heart, as to Christ; not by way of eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart." (Ephesians 6:5-6, NASB95)

Ah! At last a set of verses that have absolutely no meaning for us! We are neither slaves nor masters. We don’t even know anyone who is a slave or a master. We can just skip these verses and move on to the end of the book!

Yeh, sure.

Think back a minute to the culture in which Paul was writing. Who were the salves? Weren’t they the workforce of the day? Who did the work of our electric dishwasher? Slaves. Who worked in the shops producing what the store owners would sell? Slaves. Who trained the animals that pulled the wagons and carts of the day? Slaves. Who taught the children their “ABCs”? Slaves. Indeed, slaves were the workforce of the first century. Did this practice change just because a slave owner became a Christian? No. Slavery was a common and commonly accepted practice. Slaves, both the selling of and the using of, was crucial to the economic success of the day. Is there a modern counterpart to slavery?

I have worked at places where the answer would be a resounding “YES!” In truth, all who work for someone else are “slaves” in that they are part of the workforce. If I may flashback a couple of years, when Melanie and I sat in the gymnasium of LCC for freshman orientation, Charles McFadden, the school’s business manager, spoke to us about our relationship to the business people we were likely to work for to earn sufficient funds to pay our way through school. I can almost quote him word-for-word. “When you take a job, you are selling your time for so much an hour. That time is your employer’s. He can ask you to do anything and you have to do it because he bought your time. You have become his slave for that period of your life.”

Hmmm. I became a slave to CIE&G. For eight hours a day on Monday and three hours a day the rest of the week, I was the slave to Carl Deitz. What he asked; I did. If he wanted a portion of a map traced, I traced it. If he wanted me to help measure a gas line, I measured. If he wanted me to design a railroad permit requesting permission to put a water line under the tracks, I measured, I sketched, I drew, and I made sure it met the specs of the particular railroad company involved. If he wanted to sit and talk about the Korean Conflict, of which he was a veteran, I sat and listened to him talk. He was the master; I was the slave. I did what he wanted, how he wanted, and when he wanted … no questions asked, no challenges made. Those were the rules.


So, where did all of this come from? Where did Mr. McFadden get his crazy idea? That’s right … from the Apostle Paul in today’s verses. We might paraphrase Paul like this: Employees, obey your earthly employers. They hold your future in the palm of their hands. They can fire you without warning for little or no reason, so don’t give them any reason at all! But, out of the goodness of your heart and a desire to please even the toughest boss, do what he asks as though it was Jesus who was doing the asking!” Boy, that puts a different spin on things. Look at my boss as though he was Jesus? That might be asking a lot of some bosses … but that is Paul’s command. But wait … there is more! “… not by way of eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart.” “Don’t obey just when the boss is watching,” Paul says, “but always just as though Jesus was your physical boss. In being this type of employee, you are doing God’s work … and you are doing things for your earthly boss from the heart … because you want to do good for him – even if he doesn’t seem to appreciate your efforts!

Next time … the bosses take a shot!

Harley
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Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Eph 6:4 (NASB)

Boy, I wish I had a dollar for every time my daughters pulled this one on me! “Tara, do your homework now.” “Dad, the Bible says not to provoke your children to wrath.” Huh? How is obeying parents and provoking children intertwined? I have been trying to justify that one for years. The point is … they don’t. My daughters were just trying to get out of work … or whatever they were told to do. If causing them to be obedient also caused them to be angry, so be it. That is not the anger Paul is talking about. Let’s examine this verse together.

“Fathers …” Does that mean mothers are exempt from this admonition? Remember, New Testament fathers were the undisputed head of household. Some teachers were teaching that women were just possessions of the husband! He could do anything he wanted with her. I’m glad that time is over. And, despite what feminists today think, the Apostle Paul was in the forefront of the fight to change that position. They pick up on the “submit” thing and totally ignore the “there is no male nor female in the Kingdom of God,” but that’s a different text. No, mothers are indeed included in this teaching. Because mothers in our society have a very important role in the disciplining of their children, they have opportunity to provoke children to anger, just like dads do.

“… do not provoke …” Provoking gives the impression of intentionality. The parent who intentionally teases a child to cause that child to lash out is guilty of this verse. While it may be taken the way my daughters tried to spin this verse, most of us parents are “not guilty” in God’s court of law. If anything, we are guilty of breaking part of the rest of the verse.

“… your children to anger …” The word anger indicates an uncontrollable and violent outburst towards someone. A temper tantrum in the grocery store because the parent will not buy a box of “Sicky Sweet Jumbo Chewies” is not the anger Paul is warning us against. While a temper tantrum appears to be anger, it is just a ploy to manipulate the parent. The worst thing a parent can do is give in to that type of manipulation … even if we “spiritualize it” as “no provoking our children.”

“… but bring them up …” We can translate that “mature them” or “raise them”. Our role as parents is to make adults out of our children. The first and foremost part of that process is “passing the torch” to the next generation of “Hudsons” (insert your last name in place of mine!) Our goal as Christian parents is to make sure that our children know Jesus Christ as their Savior and live their lives being who God created them to be.” It’s not easy being a parent … but someone has to do it; and if we bring a child into the world, it is our responsibility to be the parents.

“… in the discipline …” Here’s where most of us fail. Our discipline is either not severe enough … or not consistent enough. On some occasions, our discipline may not “fit the crime” and be too severe, but in today’s society, that is not the norm. Proverbs tells us to “spare the rod and spoil the child.” No, Solomon is not directing us to spoil our children – that’s the grandparents role! He is giving us the consequence of not disciplining our children properly. If you are in the child rearing stage of life … or your children are in that stage … buy and read The New Dare to Discipline by Dr, James Dobson. There is no better counsel on the subject, but in a nutshell, I will say that consistent disciple is the most important part of the process.

“… instruction of the Lord.” This is the passing the torch part. We must find a way to impart the light of salvation to our children. Far too many of them leave home as “Christians” and become “hellions” in college. I taught in a Christian school for several years. Even there I have seen the failure of the parenting process. It is not healthy to cram “religion” down the throats of our youth. We must raise them in an atmosphere of Christian love, discipline, and instruction. If their salvation does not result in changed lives and children living “Christianly”, then we have failed as parents no matter how successful they are in the business world!

I guess I have said enough.

Harley
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c. 2005 Harley E. Hudson

If you received Verse of the Day as a forward and you wish to have your own subscription, simply send an e-mail to hhudson719@earthlink.net and request a free subscription.
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Activities and Events of Interest
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Albemarle Kid's Fishing Tournament, Saturday, June 11th
Highway 371 Training Center - 10 am to 1 pm - Free Tee Shirts
Lots of Prizes - Hamburgers and Hot Dogs.
Check In @ 9:30 am - Fishing begins @ 10 am - Weigh In @ 1 pm
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The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Sgt. Kurt D. Schamberg, 26, of Euclid, Ohio, died May 20, in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his HMMWV. Schamberg was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 14th Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade, 10th Mountain Division, Fort Drum, N.Y.

02. Sgt. Benjamin C. Morton, 24, of Wright, Kan., died May 22, in Mosul, Iraq, when his dismounted patrol encountered enemy small arms fire. Morton was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 24th Infantry Regiment, 1st Brigade, 25th Infantry Division (Stryker Brigade Combat Team), Fort Lewis, Wash.

03. Sgt. Kenneth J. Schall, 22, of Peoria, Ariz., died May 22, in Yusafiyah, Iraq, when the HMMWV in which he was riding was involved in an accident. Schall was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 70th Armor Regiment, 3rd Brigade, 1st Armored Division, Fort Riley, Kan.

04. Spc. Joshua T. Brazee, 25, of Sand Creek, Mich., died May 23, in Al Qaim, Iraq, from non-combat related injuries. Brazee was assigned to the 1st Squadron, 3d Armored Cavalry Regiment, Fort Carson, Colo.

05. Pfc. Steven C. Tucker, 19, of Grapevine, Texas, died May 21, in Kandahar, Afghanistan, of injuries sustained near Shinkay, Afghanistan, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his HMMWV. Tucker was assigned to the Army's 2nd Battalion, 503rd Infantry Regiment, 173rd Airborne Brigade, Vicenza, Italy.

06. Sgt. Antwan L. Walker, 22, of Tampa, Fla., died May 18 in Ar Ramadi, Iraq, when his camp was attacked by enemy forces using indirect fire. Walker was assigned to the Army's 2nd Forward Support Battalion, 2nd Infantry Division, Fort Carson, Colo.

07. Pfc. Kyle M. Hemauer, 21, of Manassas, Va., died May 23 in Zabul, Afghanistan, of non-combat related injuries. Hemauer was assigned to the Army National Guard's 3rd Battalion, 116th Infantry Regiment, 29th Infantry Division, Manassas, Va.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died on May 22 in Mosul, Iraq, from injuries sustained when an improvised explosive device detonated near their HMMWV. Both were assigned to the 73rd Engineer Company, Fort Lewis, Wash. Killed were:
08. 1st Lt. Aaron N. Seesan, 25, of Ohio.
09. Spc. Tyler L. Creamean, 21, of Jacksonville, Ark.

10. Sgt. Brad A. Wentz, 21, of Gladwin, Mich., died May 20 on a main supply route in Iraq when his convoy came under attack by enemy forces. Wentz was assigned to the Army Reserve's 180th Transportation Company, Muskegon, Mich.

11. Sgt. Charles T. Wilkerson, 30, of Kansas City, Mo., died May 22 in Baghdad, Iraq, when an unknown ordnance detonated near his tent. Wilkerson was assigned to the 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment, Fort Carson, Colo.

12. Sgt. Christopher S. Perez, 30, of Hutchinson, Kan., died May 23 from wounds received as a result of an indirect fire attack while conducting combat operations against enemy forces in Ramadi, Iraq. He was assigned to Headquarters and Service Battalion, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

13. Sgt. John B. Ogburn III, 45, of Fruitland, Ore., died May 22, in Kirkuk, Iraq, when his HMMWV overturned after the driver avoided striking a civilian vehicle. Ogburn was assigned to the Army National Guard's 3rd Battalion, 116th Armored Cavalry Regiment, Ontario, Ore.

14. Sgt. Carl J. Morgain, 40, of Butler, Pa., died May 22, in Balad, Iraq, of injuries sustained in Kadasia, Iraq, when a vehicle-borne improvised explosive device detonated near his HMMWV. Morgain was assigned to the Army National Guard's 1st Battalion, 112th Infantry Regiment, Butler, Pa.

15. Sgt. 1st Class Peter J. Hahn, 31, of Metairie, La., died May 24, in Baghdad, Iraq, when his observation point was engaged by enemy forces using small arms fire. Hahn was assigned to the Army National Guard's 2nd Battalion, 156th Infantry Regiment, 256th Brigade Combat Team, New Iberia, La.

16. Staff Sgt. Russell J. Verdugo, 34, of Phoenix, Ariz., died May 23, in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated as he was responding to a report of an improvised explosive device. Verdugo was assigned to the 767th Ordnance Company, Fort McNair, Washington, D.C.

17. Sgt. David N. Wimberg, 24, of Louisville, Ky., died May 25 from wounds received as a result of small-arms fire from enemy forces while conducting combat operations in Hadithah, Iraq. Wimberg was assigned to Marine Forces Reserve’s 3rd Battalion, 25th Marine Regiment, 4th Marine Division, Columbus, Ohio. During Operation Iraqi Freedom, his unit was attached to 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward).

18. Sgt. First Class Randy D. Collins, 36, of Long Beach, Calif., died May 24 at the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda, Md., of injuries sustained in Mosul, Iraq, May 4 during a mortar attack. Collins was assigned to the Army's 11th Armored Cavalry Regiment, Fort Irwin, Calif.

The Department of Defense announced the death of four soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died on May 23 in Haswa, Iraq, when their military vehicle was struck by an improvised explosive device. The soldiers are:
19. Spec. Bryan Edward Barron, 26, of Biloxi, Miss. Barron was assigned to the Army National Guard's C Company, 1st Battalion, 155th Infantry, Biloxi, Miss.
20. Spec. Audrey Daron Lunsford, 29, of Sardis, Miss. Lunsford was assigned to the Army National Guard's Headquarters and Headquarters Company, 1st Battalion, 155th Infantry, McComb, Miss.
21. Staff Sgt. Saburant Parker, 43, of Foxworth, Miss. Parker was assigned to the Army National Guard's C Company, 1st Battalion, 155th Infantry, Biloxi, Miss.
22. Sgt. Daniel Ryan Varnado, 23, of Saucier, Miss. Varnado was assigned to the Army National Guard's C Company, 1st Battalion, 155th Infantry, Biloxi, Miss.

Remains of American MIAS Found in North Korea

Specialists from the Joint POW/MIA Accounting Command (JPAC) have recovered remains believed to be those of American soldiers missing in action from the Korean War. The remains will be repatriated to U.S. control at Yongsan Military Compound in Seoul on May 26.

From Seoul, the remains will be flown to Hickam Air Force Base, Hawaii, where the forensic identification process will take place in the JPAC laboratory to determine the precise number of recovered American soldiers. This is the first repatriation of remains from this year’s recovery operations in North Korea, and marks the beginning of the 10th consecutive year for the mission there.

Since 1996, 33 joint operations have been conducted in North Korea, during which remains believed to be those of more than 220 soldiers have been recovered. Of the 88,000 U.S. servicemembers missing in action from all conflicts, more than 8,100 are from the Korean War.

The JPAC specialists’ consisted of a 27-man U.S. element divided into two recovery teams. The first team operated near the Chosin Reservoir where the 1st Marine Division and the Army’s 7th Infantry Division fought Chinese forces November-December 1950. Approximately 1,000 Americans are missing in action from battles of the Chosin campaign.

The second team recovered remains in Unsan County about 60 miles north of Pyongyang. This area was the site of battles between communist forces and the U.S. Army’s 1st Cavalry and 25th Infantry divisions in November 1950.

The joint remains recovery work resulted from negotiations with North Korea led by the Defense POW/Missing Personnel Office.
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Remember that for every soldier killed in modern war, 10 are wounded. Don't forget to pray for them and their families.
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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Scheduled Activities
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Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 8 p.m. Monday - Friday. At noon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and at 7 p.m. Sunday at 914 N. Vine
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Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
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Columbia County Diabetes Support Group - Every third Monday, 7:00 p.m. room 222, Magnolia Hospital
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"Focus on the Family" with Dr. James Dobson weekday afternoons at 1 PM on KVMA am 630 it's a great show!
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MCC - Abraham Prayer - Sunday at 5:00 p.m and Wednesday from 11:30 am to 1:00 pm
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MCC - Early Morning Prayer - Monday - Friday, From 6:30 am to 8:00 am
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MCC - "Beth Moore" Video Class - Thursday nights at 5:45 pm
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MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets at 1051 Columbia 36 the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
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MCC - Firm Foundations Class, Sunday 9:30 to 10:15 a.m
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MCC - Meadow Brook Nursing Home Ministry Tuesday from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m
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MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
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MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
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MCC - Over comers: Fridays @ 7:00 p.m- Director, Traci Foster invites you to a 12 step Christian support program. For anyone with a life controlling problem. Child care is provided.
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Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
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Narcotics Anonymous 5-6 pm every Monday at 220 Pine street.
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TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 5 pm every Tuesday in the Magnolia Hospital break room.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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"Fight till you win!" - - Mark Brazee
"Bring 'em on!" - -President George W. Bush
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"If you can read this e-mail, thank a teacher. - - If you read it in English, thank a serviceman."
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed people can change the world; indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." - - Margaret Mead
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Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Isa 60:1-2 Jer 30:18-19 Gal 6:14-16 James 5:10-11 2 Tim 2:24-26
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E-mail at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. For the "Blog" version just go to http://bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com/ to see the latest issue. This week, "Word" and "PDF" subscribers get to see photos of Blossom Festival.
Let us hear from you if we can switch you over to the "Word" or "PDF" version of "Da Bleat".
If you'd prefer to read "Da Blog" version, just drop us a note at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com and we'll switch you from e:mail delivery to "Da Bleat" Blog. Of course "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com to see the latest issue (usually updated sometime Friday evening or Saturday morning. We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent.
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