GCF: How Fathers Were Created

Volume 7, Issue 24

Hello All,

This evening, we went out to Robert and Kelly Davidson’s for a “pre teen” birthday party. It was grand. There were kids everywhere. Multiple babies crawling, several toddlers toddling and many children running in and out.
Robert had the horses out so the guys stayed around the barnyard watching the kids ride. In the meantime, the ladies prepared a feast.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. This is a great community.
~~~~~
Speaking of community, we’re negotiating with a surgeon at Magnolia Hospital. The city has been without someone to do basic surgery since Dr. Macman retired.
As I understand it, they haven’t got the money “right” yet. Doesn’t a “Great Place To Live” count for anything?
~~~~~
Recent events have troubled me to the extent that I’m going to sound off a little this evening. I hope I don’t offend anyone but I believe that we have to take a stand.
Unfortunately I don’t have the clarity of the writing of AKM nor the technical expertise of TS. Please bear with me.
~~~~~
By the way, what do you think of the suicide bombers in Iraq and Israel? I heard them described as “Human Sacrifices” the other day.
Then it dawned on me that we’re dealing with a religious sect or splinter group that practices “Human Sacrifice.” Just like the Incas and other primitive tribes. They’re taking young men and women and sacrificing them to their god.
Note that I didn’t capitalize the word. Our God is the great God. Christ told us that he came to bring life and it more abundantly. He also said that the devil came to steal, kill and destroy.
Which group does the zealots who sacrifice children belong to?
~~~~~
Traitors line up

Senator Dick Durbin of Illinois, the second highest-ranking Democrat in the Senate, speaking on the Senate floor Wednesday, compared American troops at Guantanamo Naval Base to Hitler, the Soviet gulags and Cambodian mass murderer Pol Pot.

Hitler murdered two million Christians and six million Jews. Nearly two million prisoners died in the Soviet gulags. And Pol Pot slaughtered as many as ten million in Cambodia.

Durbin compared the American troops to Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot because of alleged mistreatment of prisoners held at Guantanamo. What earned these American troops the disparaging remarks by Senator Durbin? He said that some prisoners’ air conditioners were turned down too low, some had their air conditioners turned off making the room hot, and loud rap music was played in a room where there were prisoners.

That a U.S. Senator would compare American military men and women to Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pott is beyond belief. Does he not remember 9/11?

When asked to apologize, he refused. He said it is the military that should apologize for how they were treating the prisoners of war.

Now I’ve got to say that I don’t agree with those who say it doesn’t matter how we treat these prisoners. They say that “the end justifies the means” when it comes to getting information out of these people. Especially if that information saves American civilian or military lives.
To me, that type of thinking IS comparable with Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot who committed horrendous crimes to further their particular causes.

We need to remember whom we have believed in and that He is able to care for us. But if we stoop to the methods of our enemies, are we not worshiping THEIR god? Ps 41:11 - By this I know that thou favourest me, because mine enemy doth not triumph over me. 2Ti 1:12 - ... for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.

However, with that said, the excesses and minor abuse that these prisoners have been subjected to in no way compares to the acts of the afore mentioned despots. I’ve talked with our soldiers and I’m convinced that such mistreatment is not epidemic and in no way reflects the attitudes of our fighting men and women.

The fact is that these prisoners are the worst of the worst. Their comrades flew the planes into the World Trade Center Towers and the Pentagon. Their cohorts are daily attacking our soldiers and killing innocent men, women and children.

Here we sit, in the greatest nation on earth, with all our freedoms and material possessions and we strain at the gnat of minor mistreatment of some of the vilest creatures on earth.
In the meantime our so-called allies such as Saudi Arabia are burning the bibles of Christian Saudis and Christians are being slaughtered by the tens of thousands in Sudan.

In discussing this issue as well as calls for us to close Guantanamo and get out of Iraq the question needs to be asked; “If we pull out of Iraq, where will we run to?” Do you think these terrorists will quit attacking us?

Much better for us to continue fighting them there than giving them peace to build strength to come here.

Like the American Family Association, I urge you to TAKE ACTION!

Send Senator Durbin an email reminding him that our soldiers are there to serve their country by guarding the prisoners of war, and that they do a pretty good job.

Click http://www.afa.net/Petitions/TakeAction.asp?id=133 To Send Your Letter Now!

One other thing. While you’re at it, write your Senators, Congressmen, Legislators, etc. Let them know that you will not tolerate them if they acquiesce to Senator Durbin. If they don’t condemn his words post haste, we should ensure that they do not return to office next election.

Here’s what I wrote to Senator Durbin;

Dear Senator Durbin,

I am greatly disappointed that a United States Senator would compare our soldiers at Guantanamo to Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot. A cold or hot room and loud rap music in no way compares with gas chambers, starvation or being shot.

You owe our troops an apology. I hope it will be forthcoming but I doubt it. You probably did this as a cheap shot to get publicity. If it wasn't intentional, then you're probably not intelligent enough to apologize.

James F. McClellan
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I know that wasn’t very respectful but I don’t think this guy deserves any respect.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
And here’s what I wrote our congressman, Mike Ross;

The silence of you and your party members on Senator Dick Durbin's comments is much louder than what he said originally.

Congressman, I know that you have to live in a political world, but this is way over the line.

I also appreciate everything you've done for our district. However, you need to know that I will work for your defeat if you do not speak out against this man.

James F. McClellan
Magnolia
~~~~~
Sgt. John Burns was the guest speaker at “Faith Builders” small group last Tuesday. Sgt Burns shared his testimony of drowning in an Iraq sewer canal after his Humvee was hit by an explosive device and how his troops risked their lives to pull him out of the submerged vehicle. This man was a blessing and an inspiration to us all. I had the privilege of visiting with him while we were enjoying the FANTASTIC potluck supper that our “Faith Builders” brought to the meeting. Every time you punch this man, Christ comes out. If you get a chance to hear him or meet him, don’t miss it.
Sergeant First Class Jonathan Burns is a member of Magnolia's Delta Company 3-153 Infantry. He has 17 years of service in the military and has served in deployments to Operation Desert Shield/Storm, Operation Joint Forge (in Bosnia), and Operation Iraqi Freedom. He has received the Joint Service Achievement Award, the Army Commendation Award with valor, the Kuwait Liberation Award, NATO Medal, Armed Forces Expeditionary medal, the National Defense medal, and most recently, a Bronze Star award.
He has been married to Amy Burns for 7 years and they have two sons, Trevor, 5 years and Lucas, 3 years, and are expecting their third child in September. He currently serves as a deacon at Bethany Baptist Church of El Dorado and enjoys fishing and hunting with his family and friends.
~~~~~
They say it's a "planetary nebula." They think. Ever check out the "Astronomy Picture of the Day"
website? Click on: http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/astropix.html

Weird, beautiful stuff there.
Thanks to AKM
~~~~~
The 2005 Purple Hull Pea Festival will be June 24 & 25. Be there or “B Square”.
~~~~~
On behalf of the Boys & Girls Club and Neca Stockwell, I have been asked to send an email requesting assistance by volunteers to work the Boys & Girls Club Tournament June 23 - June 26. They truly need help! The places of concern are the concession stand and the gate. Times as follows:
June 23 (Thursday) 2pm - 9pm,
June 24 & 25 (Friday & Saturday) 9am - 8pm,
June 26 (Sunday) 1pm - 6 pm.
Neca suggested that maybe a 2-hour volunteer time would work. She states anytime is greatly appreciated! You can contact Neca at 234-3300 and her cell number is 562-9243.

Thank you in advance!

Sherry L Bell
Leadership Magnolia Board Member
~~~~~
A good friend shared this story with us.

A True story, unfortunately:

Walking home yesterday, I took a short cut through the First Tennessee Bank parking lot, a route I normally don't take. I saw smoke coming off a bit of ornamental shrubbery, and decided to investigate.

The smoke was coming from the base of the trunk, though as far as I could tell, the shrub wasn't damaged. I went inside the bank and said, "Is there any reason that you would be burning one of the shrubs out in the parking area?"

"The what?" a teller said.

"Bush," I said, "you've got a bush burning out in the parking lot."

"I'll get some water," one of the tellers said, and hurried off. I went back outside to wait for her. When I got back to the bush, flames had started to appear around the trunk base, so I stamped them out. A guy who had been sitting in a car rushed over to see what was going on. About this time, the teller appeared with a carafe of water and poured it over the trunk and on the ground around it. "You think that'll do it?" she asked.

"Probably," I said--and then thought: shrub on fire, bush burning . . . burning bush . . .

"Unless," I said, "this was a Divine manifestation, and we just screwed it up." The other two started laughing.

I did not tell them my last name.
~~~~~
Our friend, Terry Stockdale, is starting a new, free weekly computer tips newsletter Terry's Computer Tips and has moved all his computer articles to the corresponding site http://www.terryscomputertips.com . The first issue will be June 20th.

The newsletter and site will give tips, discuss and answer questions about Windows and Linux; about free, shareware and commercial software products; hardware and software products and issues; home computer security; home networking; new developments in the computer world; and Personal Digital Assistants (PDAs). Terry welcomes questions and comments from newsletter and web site readers.

Terry’s main site's computer forums (which are open to everyone) and his blog are available as links from TerrysComputerTips.com, as well as being accessible directly via http://www.terrystockdale.com and http://www.thenextwindow.com .

Terry Stockdale -- Baton Rouge, LA
My main website: http://www.TerryStockdale.com
My blog: http://www.TheNextWindow.com
~~~~~
Don't forget ... "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular Mid Premium Diesel
Current Avg. $2.14 $2.27 $2.35 $2.340
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
Magnolia Wal-Mart today; $2.06
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week; Corn on the Cob with Chili and Lime Recipe courtesy Rachael Ray


Recipe Summary
Difficulty: Easy
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Cook Time: 8 minutes
Yield: 4 servings



4 ears sweet corn, shucked and cleaned
1 lime, wedges
½ stick butter, cut into pats
Chili powder, for sprinkling
Salt


Simmer corn 6 to 8 minutes in water. Drain and arrange the ears on a shallow plate in a single row. Squeeze all of the ears liberally with limejuice. Nest pats of butter into paper towels, or in a slice of bread and rub lime-doused hot corn with butter. Season ears with a sprinkle of chili powder and salt, to taste

http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/cooking/recipe/0,,FOOD_9936_22615,00.html
~~~~~
BREAKPOINT Commentaries
by Chuck Colson. - Prison Fellowship

Cinderella Man
A Father’s Day Message

BreakPoint with Charles Colson
June 17, 2005

The children are huddled together in one bed, trying to keep warm. The gas and electricity have been turned off; the last of the milk is gone. What stands between these children and complete disaster? Their father.

That their dad would do almost anything to save his family is the ultimate message of Cinderella Man, a wonderful new film starring Russell Crowe. Based on the life of legendary boxer James J. Braddock, the film is a celebration of a man who models sacrificial love for his family.

Braddock was born into a blue-collar, Irish Catholic family in 1906. Like most Irish boys of that day, Braddock liked to fight—and he was good at it. By age twenty, he had turned pro, winning fight after fight, and becoming one of the best young boxers in the world.

But by 1929, Braddock’s injuries—especially a badly broken right hand—began mounting. And when the stock market crashed in October, Braddock found himself washed up—and wiped out.

Braddock then fought the worst opponent of his life: the Great Depression. To feed his family, he worked at the New Jerseydocks. But the work was irregular. One desperate winter, Braddock and his wife were forced to send their children to live with relatives.

In moments of despair, Braddock turned to the priests of St. Joseph of the Palisades in West New York. As sportswriter Jim Hague notes, “The priests at St. Joseph all told Jim to keep his faith; that God would provide him the strength to carry on.”

And God did, answering Braddock’s prayers in an unexpected way. The months out of the ring allowed Braddock’s battered body to heal. And his work on the docks had an unexpected benefit: It strengthened his left hand and arm.

Then in 1934, Braddock had a chance to substitute for an absent boxer. Incredibly, he beat powerful heavyweight opponent John Griffin. He then beat two more top heavyweight contenders: John Henry Lewis and Art Lasky.

Braddock then faced heavy-weight champion Max Baer—a womanizing show-off who had already killed two men in the ring. Braddock was listed as a ten-to-one underdog, and his wife feared he’d be killed by Baer.

By now, the story of the broken-down boxer who fought to feed his family had captured America’s imagination. In Braddock, Depression-weary Americans saw a family man who, like them, struggled against common enemies of unemployment and poverty, and he did it with grace and courage.

When the day came in June 1935, Americans walked for miles to pool halls and pubs to hear the fight on the radio. I am not going to spoil the ending, in case you’re planning to see CinderellaMan. But I will say this:

Today, our elites are fond of saying that fathers are unnecessary—even destructive in the lives of their children. Millions of fatherless kids are paying the price for this attitude—children starving for a father’s love and protection. Cinderella Man gives us a tremendous example of what a father ought to be.

As we celebrate Father’s Day this weekend, I pray that fathers and fathers-to-be will be inspired by this film to be the kind of man God intends: one who sacrificially puts his love for his family above all else.

For further reading and information:

Today’s BreakPoint offer: See BreakPoint’s Recommended Films List, including recommendations from Chuck Colson.

Jeremy Schaap, Cinderella Man (Houghton Mifflin, 2005).

“1936 book on ‘Cinderella Man’ Braddock scores hit,” San Diego Union-Tribune, 13 June 2005.

Peter Heller, In This Corner . . . !: Forty-Two World Champions Tell Their Stories (Da Capo Press, 1994).

Steve Beard, “Fighting with Integrity: Cinderella Man,” Thunderstruck.org.

Frederica Mathewes-Green, “Knockout: Cinderella Man,” National Review Online, 6 June 2005.

Harry Forbes, “Cinderella Man,” Catholic News Service.

Stephen Hunter, “The Contender,” Washington Post, 3 June 2005, C01.

Stephen McGarvey, “Reel Dads,” BreakPoint WorldView, July/August 2004.

Roberto Rivera, “Patriarchy: It’s All About Transmission,” BreakPoint Online, 7 July 2003.

BreakPoint Commentary No. 040618, “Captain Obvious Strikes Again: We Do Need Dads.”

Copyright 2005 Prison Fellowship Ministries. Reprinted with permission. "BREAKPOINT with Chuck Colson" is a radio ministry of Prison Fellowship Ministries. Prison Fellowship Ministries may withdraw or modify this grant of permission at any time. To receive "BREAKPOINT" commentaries daily, you can subscribe for free at http://www. breakpoint. org/.
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
ingenuous: demonstrating childlike simplicity; also, open; frank.
manumit: to free from slavery or servitude.
hermitage: a secluded residence; a retreat.
blandishment: flattering speech or action.
peradventure: chance, uncertainty, or doubt.
antiquarian: one who collects, studies, or deals in antiquities.
naif: a naive or inexperienced person.
altercation: a heated, noisy, or angry dispute.
quorum: such a number of the officers or members of any body as is legally competent to transact business.
from Dictionary.Com
~~~~~
"To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine." - Henry Ward Beecher

"All art is autobiographical; the pearl is the oyster's autobiography." - Federico Fellini

"If you're going to sin, sin against God, not the bureaucracy; God will forgive you but the bureaucracy won't." - Hyman G. Rickover

"I'm always amazed that people will actually choose to sit in front of the television and just be savaged by stuff that belittles their intelligence." - Alice Walker

"I can, therefore I am." - Simone Weil

"Fashion is something barbarous, for it produces innovation without reason and imitation without benefit." - George Santayana

"A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices." - William James

"To dream anything that you want to dream, that is the beauty of the human mind. To do anything that you want to do, that is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself, to test your limits, that is the courage to succeed." - Bernard Edmonds

"Not to know is bad. Not to want to know is worse. Not to hope is unthinkable. Not to care is unforgivable." - Nigerian saying
~~~~~
"Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig." - Tallulah Bankhead (1903-1968) American Actor

"What we anticipate seldom occurs; what we least expected generally happens." - Benjamin Disraeli (1804-1881) British Statesman, Prime Minister, Author

"He is happiest who hath power to gather wisdom from a flower." - Mary Howitt (1804-1888) English Author, Moralist
-=-
Robert B. Mackay
(1950~) Australian Analyst

Love is the essence of life. [Amor est vitae essentia]

We can only create what we can imagine.

Smells poised on timeless wings ensnare us.

Relationships are about reality, not potentiality.

When the war process breaks down, peace will be imminent.
-=-
Abigail Adams
(1744-1818) American Letter Writer, First Lady (1797-1801)

Arbitrary power is like most other things which are very hard, very liable to be broken.

Great necessities call out great virtues.

Learning is not attained by chance. It must be sought for with ardor and attended to with diligence.

We have too many high sounding words, and too few actions that correspond to them.
-=-
Robert Frost
(1875-1963) American Poet

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

A poem begins in delight and ends in wisdom.

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It Goes On.

Most of the change we think we see in life is due to truths being in and out of favour.

The best things and best people rise out of their separateness; I'm against a homogenized society because I want the cream to rise.

The best way out of a difficulty is through it.

The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

The world is full of willing people, some willing to work, the others willing to let them.
~~~~~
This week in the Energy and Commerce Committee, a full committee hearing was held regarding the National Governor's Association's (NGA) bipartisan preliminary recommendations for comprehensive Medicaid reform. Due to the fiscal constraints of the Fiscal Year 2006 budget, Congress is being pushed toward a $10 billion cut for Medicaid over the next ten years. As a result, Medicaid reform has topped the NGA's legislative agenda. Governor Mike Huckabee, Vice Chairman of the NGA, testified before the House Committee on Energy and Commerce.

As a member of the Blue Dog Coalition, one of my top priorities is restoring fiscal discipline and responsibility to our nation's government. However, there are some programs, like Medicaid, that are essential to the health of many Americans, and funding cuts are out of the question. Medicaid, providing critical health care services for low-income children, the elderly, and the disabled, must be preserved.

We need to find ways to protect Medicaid and make it a better program from a policy perspective, not a budget cutting perspective. Recent numbers show that there are 717,000 Medicaid cases in our state. That is one in five people in Arkansas who receive Medicaid. Over half of Arkansas children are on Medicaid or have received Medicaid services this year. Close to 80% of nursing home residents are paid for by Medicaid compared to the national statistic of 55%. We must not leave behind those who rely on Medicaid to live.

It is crucial that any changes or reforms to this program do not come at the expense of the necessary benefits on which American citizens depend. Changes that have the potential to shift these beneficiaries out of the program will only add to the number of uninsured and result in increased illnesses and higher health care costs at both the state and federal levels.

Last February, I met with Governor Mike Huckabee, and he expressed concerns regarding the sustainability of Medicaid and the impact of any reduction of federal assistance with administering the program. I welcome the opportunity to work with Governor Huckabee and the NGA to ensure that Medicaid is protected and preserved and will continue to provide critical health care services for future generations of Americans and to those who need it most.

Sincerely,
Mike Ross

><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
GCF: How Fathers Were Created

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, AJ) -Tom

This originally appeared in a newspaper column by Erma Bombeck. She was a well-known humorist and author. She died April 22, 1996 in San Francisco, California.
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(Not really humor, but a nice thought in honor of Father's Day in the United States and to fathers everywhere.)

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/ UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent.
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When the good Lord was creating fathers, He started with a tall frame. A female angel nearby said, "What kind of father is that? If you're going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put fathers up so high? He won't be able to shoot marbles without kneeling, tuck a child in bed without bending or even kiss a child without a lot of stooping. And God smiled and said, "Yes, but if I make him childsize, who would children have to look up to?"

And when God made a father's hands, they were large and sinewy. The angel shook her head sadly and said, "Large hands are clumsy. They can't manage diaper pins, small buttons, rubber bands on ponytails or even remove splinters caused by baseball bats." And God smiled and said, "I know, but they're large enough to hold everything a small boy empties from his pockets at the end of a day, yet small enough to cup a child's face."

And then God molded long, slim legs and broad shoulders. The angel nearly had a heart attack. "Boy, this is the end of the week, all right," she clucked. "Do you realize you just made a father without a lap? How is he going to pull a child close to him without the kid falling between his legs?" And God smiled and said, "A mother needs a lap. A father needs strong shoulders to pull a sled, balance a boy on a bicycle or hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus."

God was in the middle of creating two of the largest feet anyone had ever seen when the angel could contain herself no longer. "That's not fair. Do you honestly think those large boats are going to dig out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries? Or walk through a small birthday party without crushing at least three of the guests?" And God smiled and said, "They'll work. You'll see. They'll support a small child who wants to ride a horse to Banbury Cross or scare off mice at the summer cabin or display shoes that will be a challenge to fill."

God worked throughout the night, giving the father few words but a firm, authoritive voice and eyes that saw everything but remained calm and tolerant. Finally, almost as an afterthought, He added tears. Then He turned to the angel and said, "Now, are you satisfied that he can love as much as a mother?"

The angel shutteth up.

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A few personal thoughts to close this special GCF.

Father's Day in the United States is the third Sunday in June. This year it is June 19. In a nutshell, Father's Day was first observed in Spokane, Washington in 1910. Over the next decade, cities across America began celebrating a day for fathers and in 1924 President Calvin Coolidge supported the idea of a national Father's Day. It wasn't until 1966 that President Lyndon Johnson signed a presidential proclamation declaring the 3rd Sunday of June as Father's Day. In 1972, President Richard Nixon established a permanent national observance of Father's Day to be held on the third Sunday of June. This came almost sixty years after Mother's Day had been proclaimed a National day of observance.

My father passed away nearly 5 years ago, but his memory lives on in my heart each and every day. He lived 250 miles away and on the drive back home from visiting family, I realized that I had not gotten to shake his hand in several months. He always believed in a firm handshake and even after his body became frail, the firmness of his handshake remained. I also miss his always cheery greeting of "Hi there, number one son."

GCF was suspended for a week back in August of 2000 and during that time I received hundreds of emails from GCF subscribers. These emails contained many kind words and thoughts conveyed to me and my family, but the words of one person said it all in one concise sentence. I apologize to the person who sent it because I cannot remember your name, but your words said it best:

"You are blessed to have a father who let you know, just by how he addressed you, how much you are loved."

If your father is no longer here, remember his memory with joy. If you are lucky enough to have your father still around, be happy with him and enjoy the day.

Happy Father's Day to all.

-Tom
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GCF: From the Classroom 2

Emailed to me by friend (Thanks, LA) -Tom (LA is a retired elementary school teacher and this is a true story)
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Students who were at least one-quarter part of any of our nation¹s Native American tribes could participate in Native American Culture classes. The program was for elementary to high school students.

One of my third grade students took home the paper work for his parents to fill out. The parents were to list the name of their family's tribe. The next morning Joe came running excitedly into the classroom shouting and waving his application, "Mrs. Abbott, Mrs. Abbott I found out what I am! I am part parakeet!"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: The Other Mark

Found at The Shark Tank (Computerworld) -Tom
http://www.computerworld.com/departments/opinions/sharktank/0,4885,102474,00.html
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Thunderstorms have rolled through the region, knocking out power temporarily to some of the stores of this supermarket chain. So when a help desk technician gets an emergency page from one store, he figures he knows how to handle it.

Turns out it's not that easy. "When I called the store, a somewhat dippy cashier answered the phone," he says. "The cash registers were all off-line, and when I gave her what I thought were simple instructions to restart the registers, she was having trouble understanding."

The flustered cashier just can't seem to get things working -- until the tech gets an idea.

"At one point the phone clicked, and she told me it was an incoming call on another line," he reports. "She clicked off and answered again right away."

"I said hi, it's Mark from the help desk."

She said, "Oh, hi! I have another guy from the help desk on the other line!
Can you help me out? I don't understand what he's telling me to do."

I replied, "That guy's name is Mark too, and he is the most knowledgeable person in our department. Just take a deep breath, calm down and let him help you get the registers back up."

Another click.

"Hello, is this Mark? I just had that other Mark on the other line. OK, now tell me again what I need to do..."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Defence Contractor

Emailed to me from another humor list (Cascade Express E-zine) -Tom To subscribe to Cascade Express E-zine, send a blank email to: Cascade_Express-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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My job is in the Aerospace Industry, and it's always been a challenge to explain what kind of work I do.

At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be as generic as possible. When the subject came up while I was talking with a group of guys, I replied simply, "Defense Contractor."

The men nodded, and as the conversation went on, I silently declared victory to myself. Then, one of them turned to me and asked, "So, what do you put up mainly? Chain-link?"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Obey.....

Emailed to me from another humor list (Cascade Express E-zine) -Tom To subscribe to Cascade Express E-zine, send a blank email to: Cascade_Express-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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Ken and Melba had finished their breakfast at the retirement home and were relaxing in the library. "You know," said Melba, "today, in most marriage ceremonies, they don't use the word 'obey' anymore."

"Too bad, isn't it?" retorted Ken. "It used to lend a little humor to the occasion."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: I Don't Get It.....

Emailed to me from another humor list (Cascade Express E-zine) -Tom To subscribe to Cascade Express E-zine, send a blank email to: Cascade_Express-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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I've got 3 TVs, cable, & a satellite dish; I have 3 phone lines in the house, a cell phone & one in the car, plus a pager.

I use 2 computers, 3 ISPs and a fax. I subscribe to two daily papers and one weekly one. I watch both the local and network news every evening.

And my kids have the nerve to tell me I'm out of touch.
_ ____________________________ _
/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( / / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ _( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / "I didn't fight my way \ /
\ _/ to the top of the food \_ /
/ / chain to be a vegetarian." \ (((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / "Warning: Dates in Calendar \ /
\ _/ are closer than they appear." \_ /
/ / \ (((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / There is a thin person \ /
\ _/ inside me screaming to get out. \_ /
/ / Fortunately I keep him sedated \ with chocolate.
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Repetition is always \ /
\ _/ better the second time. \_ /
/ / \ (((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / "Time is the best teacher. \ /
\ _/ Unfortunately it kills \_ /
/ / all its students!" \ _ ____________________________ _
/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( / / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ _( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
_( (_ | *** Good Clean Fun *** | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_|Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
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[GCFL.net] Travel Brochure Terms (translated)

Old world charm (Room and a bath)

Tropical (Rainy)

Majestic setting (A long way from town, at end of dirt road)

Options galore (Nothing is included in the itinerary)

Secluded hideaway (Directions to the location are unclear)

Some budget rooms (Sorry, already occupied)

Explore on your own (At your own expense)

Knowledgeable trip hosts (They've flown in an airplane
before)

No extra fees (No extras)

Nominal fee (Outrageous charge)

Standard (Sub-standard)

Deluxe (Barely Standard)

Superior accommodations (One complimentary chocolate, free
shower cap)

All the amenities (Two chocolates, two shower caps)

Plush (Both top and bottom sheets)

Gentle breezes (In hurricane alley)

Light and airy (No air conditioning)

Picturesque (Theme park nearby)

24-hour bar (Ice cubes at additional cost - when available)

Received from Jeanene.
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[GCFL.net] Hymn #365

A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great statement he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river."

With even greater emphasis he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river!"

And then finally, he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river!"

Sermon complete, he then sat down.

The song leader stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, "For our closing song, let us sing Hymn #365: 'Shall We Gather at the River.'"

Received from Bob Seegmiller.
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[GCFL.net] Golfing Groom

The bride came down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.

She said, "What are your golf clubs doing here?"

He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all day, is it?"

Received from John Park, College Station, TX.
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[GCFL.net] Interruption

During a sermon one Sunday, the pastor heard two teenage girls in the back giggling and disturbing people.

He interrupted his sermon and announced sternly, "There are two of you here who have not heard a word I've said." That quieted them down.

When the service was over, he went to greet people at the front door. Three different adults apologized for going to sleep in church, promising it would never happen again.

Received from LaVonne.
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[GCFL.net] Blonde on Airplane

One day a blonde was riding on an airplane. There was a loud noise that came from outside the plane. The captain came on the intercom, "Attention passengers, we just lost one of our engines; but don't worry, the other three engines will keep us up. Also, we will arrive at our destination about an hour behind schedule."

Half an hour later, another loud noise sounded from outside the plane. The captain once again came on the intercom, "Attention passengers, do not be alarmed. We lost another engine, but the other two will still keep us flying. We will arrive at our destination about three hours late."

After the captain said this, the blonde leaned over to the passenger next to her and said, "If those other two engines go out, we'll be up here forever."

Received from Landon Estay.
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– NEW! Go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20050124 to rate this funny from 0 to 5.
-=+=-
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List "A cheerful heart is good medicine!" (Prov 17:22a) Go to http://gcfl.net/mlfrontend.php to change your subscription options or unsubscribe. To email this funny to a friend, go to http://gcfl.net/emailit.php?funny=20050107 The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://gcfl.net/latest.php
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter from Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.
Today's Clean Laugh

Visiting Friends

Hush-A-Bye Buddy
In our guest room
It's been three weeks now --
Are you leaving us soon?
We'll all miss your snoring
And carrying on,
But please--
Won't you go back
To Boca Raton?

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Wedding Cake Verse

A couple was arranging for their wedding, and asked the bakery to inscribe the wedding cake with "1 John 4:18" which reads "There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear."

The bakery evidently lost, smudged or otherwise misread the noted reference, and beautifully inscribed on the cake "John 4:18" ...

"for you have had five husbands, and the man you have now is not your husband."

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Freezer Order

I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals.

Forget calling them "Veal Parmigiana" or "Turkey Loaf" or "Beef Pot Pie."

If you look in my freezer you'll see "Whatever," "Anything," "I Don't Know," and, my favorite, "Food."

That way when I ask my husband what he wants for dinner, I'm certain to have what he wants."

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Curve Hand

A guy was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night and in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him.

Suddenly he saw a car coming toward him and stop.

Without thinking about it, the guy got into the back seat, closed the door and then realized there was nobody behind the wheel! The car started slowly; the guy looked at the road and saw a curve coming his way. Scared, he started to pray begging for his life. He hadn't come out of shock, when just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and moved the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand appeared every time right before a curve.

Gathering his strength, the guy finally jumped out of the car and ran to the nearest town. Wet and in shock, he went to a restaurant and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through.

A silence enveloped everybody when they realized the guy was serious.

About half an hour later, two guys walked in the same restaurant. They looked around for a table when one said to the other,

"Look John, that's the dummy who got in the car when we were pushing it."

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

Doll Play

Toward the end of our senior year in high school, we were required to take a CPR course.

The classes used the well known mannequin victim, Resusci-Annie, to practice. Typical of most models, this Resusci-Annie was only a torso, to allow for storage in a carrying case.

The class went off in groups to practice.

As instructed, one of my classmates gently shook the doll and asked "Are you all right?" He then put his ear over the mannequin's mouth to listen for breathing.

Suddenly he turned to the instructor and exclaimed, "She said she can't feel her legs!"

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh

*Eye Laugh*

"Cat Judgement"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=72

"Tow By Three"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=63

"Horse Meeting"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=64

"Summer Love"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=65

"Hard To Find"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=68

Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/bashed_attorney.html - - Diary Of A Bashed Attorney "Why did I go to law school? Work is unbearable, I have no free time, and I'm expected to "make rain" at parties. To somehow extract legal fees from revelers who sidle up, drinks in one hand, hors d'oeuvres in the other, looking for free advice. My reward? Lawyer jokes..."
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Biographical Dictionary - - http://s9.com/biography/ - - This dictionary covers more than 28,000 notable men and women who have shaped our world from ancient times to the present day.
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Google Sightseeing - - http://www.googlesightseeing.com/ - - This site takes you to the best tourist spots in the world via Google Maps' satellite imagery. Locations are listed by categories and most popular posts.
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Sears Archives - - http://www.searsarchives.com/ - - Once again, Sears has made history. For the first time, Sears has opened the doors to its vast archival collection and invited the public to peek inside. More than 100 years of stories, product and brand histories, photographs, catalog images are now available online.
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September 11, 2001: Documentary Project - - http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/911_archive/ - - The September 11, 2001, Documentary Project, part of the Library of Congress 'American Memory' collection, captures the heartfelt reactions, eyewitness accounts, and diverse opinions of Americans and others in the months that followed the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center, the Pentagon, and United Airlines Flight 93. Patriotism and unity mixed with sadness, anger, and insecurity are common themes expressed in this online presentation of almost 200 audio and video interviews, 45 graphic items, and 21 written narratives.
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Red Cross: Summer Safety Tips - - http://www.redcross.org/services/hss/sumsafety/ - - School's out, pools are open and people across the country are looking for fun ways to cool down as summer temperatures heat up. As you head to the beach, to the pool, or to the mountains for a camping vacation, the American Red Cross encourages you and your family to keep safety in mind!
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College Results Online - - http://www.collegeresults.org/ - - This site allows you to see a four-year university's overall graduation rate and changes over time, minority student completion rates, and to compare the graduation rates to students at similar institutions.
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Chasing the Sun - - http://www.pbs.org/kcet/chasingthesun/ - - This PBS site presents the history of commercial aviation seen through the eyes of its innovators.
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First-Aid Guide - - http://www.mayoclinic.com/findinformation/firstaidandselfcare/index.cfm - - Medical emergencies don't occur every day. But when they do, you should have the information you need to deal with these situations. This site by the Mayo Clinic provides information and direction.
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"More Americans than ever with mental disorders are trying to get care, but only a third receive effective treatments, says a landmark government survey out June 6, 2005. Rates of mental illness have flattened in the past 15 years after steadily rising from the 1950s. 'That's reassuring and a little surprising, given the economic slumps and 9/11,' says survey director Ronald Kessler of Harvard Medical School. About one in four adults have the symptoms of at least one mental illness every year, and nearly half suffer disorders during their lifetimes, according to the study of 9,282 people published in the Archives of General Psychiatry. The study is a detailed update of large federal surveys done in the '80s and '90s. On the positive side, 41% with a disorder went for treatment in the past year, up from 25% a decade ago and 19% two decades ago. The more severe the disorder, the more likely a person was to get good care."
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"Health experts increasingly are faulting a recent study by scientists at the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention that concluded obesity is not nearly as dangerous as was thought and that being a little plump might actually lower the risk of death. At a news conference, CDC chief Dr. Julie Gerberding acknowledged potential flaws in the study and pledged to get scientists and the public back on track. 'It is not OK to be overweight. People need to be fit, they need to have a healthy diet, they need to exercise,' she said. 'I'm very sorry for the confusion that these scientific discussions have had.' Obesity raises the risk of heart disease, some cancers, diabetes and arthritis, and being overweight raises blood pressure and cholesterol, which in turn raise the risk of heart disease, she noted." - Source
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"NASA is moving ahead with plans to put a long-armed lander on Mars' icy north pole to search for clues for water and possible signs of life, the space agency said June 3, 2005. The $386 million Phoenix Mars is scheduled to touch down in the Martian arctic in May 2008. The stationary probe will use its robotic arm to dig into the icy terrain and scoop up soil samples to analyze. In 2002, the Mars Odyssey orbiter spotted evidence of ice-rich soil near the arctic surface. Scientists hope the Phoenix mission will yield clues to the geologic history of water on the Red Planet and determine whether microbes existed in the ice. Phoenix will be the first mission of the Mars Scout program, a renewed, low-cost effort to study the Red Planet." - Source
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"In a sure sign that the era of mobile computing has arrived, notebooks have for the first time outsold desktops in the United States in a calendar month, the research firm Current Analysis says. After tracking sales from a sampling of electronics retailers, Current Analysis says notebook sales accounted for 53 percent of the total personal computer market last month, up from 46 percent during the same period last year. San Diego-based Current Analysis does not follow worldwide personal computer sales. Spurring demand for notebooks is their overall price drop as quality has improved, says Sam Bhavnani, senior analyst for Current Analysis. 'Just a few years ago, the performance of notebooks was nowhere near where it is today,' he said." - Source
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"Dieters looking for another edge might want to consider exercising their sense of humor - scientists have found that a good laugh is a calorie burner not to be ignored. It may not be as good for reducing the waistline as going to the gym or resisting that ice-cream sundae, but American researchers have found that 10-15 minutes of genuine giggling can burn off the number of calories found in a medium square of chocolate. The findings on the weight-loss possibilities of the uniquely human experience of laughter were presented at the close of the annual European Congress on Obesity on June 4, 2005." - Source
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"America's most common apple also may be its most potent. Just don't skimp on the skin. A Canadian government study that measured the levels of antioxidants in eight varieties of apples found that Red Delicious contain the highest concentrations of the health enhancing chemicals. And to get the most bang for your bite, be sure to eat the peel. The skin of Red Delicious apples - the most common variety grown in the United States - contains over six times more antioxidant activity than the flesh, according to researchers at Agriculture and Agri-Food Canada. But don't swear off other varieties just yet. Though antioxidants are believed to help ward off certain diseases, more research is needed to determine whether quantity alone counts. The study did not consider whether antioxidants in some apples may be better absorbed than others." - Source
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"Could the petroleum joyride - cheap, abundant oil that has sent the global economy whizzing along with the pedal to the metal and the AC blasting for decades - be coming to an end? Some observers of the oil industry think so. They predict that this year, maybe next - almost certainly by the end of the decade - the world's oil production, having grown exuberantly for more than a century, will peak and begin to decline. And then it really will be all downhill. The price of oil will increase drastically. Major oil-consuming countries will experience crippling inflation, unemployment and economic instability. Princeton University geologist Kenneth S. Deffeyes predicts 'a permanent state of oil shortage.' According to these experts, it will take a decade or more before conservation measures and new technologies can bridge the gap between supply and demand, and even then the situation will be touch and go." - Source
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"Americans are far more likely to consider religion central to their lives and to support giving clergy a say in public policy than people in nine countries that are close allies, according to an AP-Ipsos poll. Yet, the U.S. embrace of faith has its limits. Religion and public policy often mix in the United States. Recent examples include the bitter fight over the appointment of judges and the fate of Terry Schiavo, the brain-damaged woman whose feeding tube was removed despite efforts by the GOP-led Congress."
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| Safety From The Heart |

June 16, 2005
Impressive Chemicals

Today's Message is from Gene McPherson (a Houston Albemarle employee)

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I have a ruptured 4" safety disc in my office to remind me that we handle some impressive chemicals here. Our plant has chemicals that can decompose, combust spontaneously or turn your lips blue. Make sure that you know the hazards of chemicals in your area and treat them with respect.

The disc in my office failed at 1000 psig, but should have failed at about 1200 psig. The failure was due to a box of bad discs. We changed two out of the box of 6 before we discarded the rest of that lot.
____________________________________

June 15, 2005

From Columbia, SC WISTV web site:
http://www.wistv.com/Global/category.asp?C=1683&nav=0RaN

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Today: Mostly sunny. High near 98.
Heat index: 100-105.

Today (6/15/05) will be the hottest day of the year so far. Highs will reach the upper 90s with the heat index between 100-105.

Here are some tips you need to stay safe when temperatures are dangerously high.

Knowing the terms

 Heat wave: Prolonged period of excessive heat and humidity. The National Weather Service steps up its procedures to alert the public during these periods of excessive heat and humidity.
 Heat index: A number in degrees Fahrenheit (F) that tells how hot it really feels when relative humidity is added to the actual air temperature. Exposure to full sunshine can increase the heat index by 15 degrees F.
 Heat cramps: Heat cramps are muscular pains and spasms due to heavy exertion. Although heat cramps are the least severe, they are an early signal that the body is having trouble with the heat.
 Heat exhaustion: Heat exhaustion typically occurs when people exercise heavily or work in a hot, humid place where body fluids are lost through heavy sweating. Blood flow to the skin increases, causing blood flow to decrease to the vital organs. This results in a form of mild shock. If not treated, the victim may suffer heat stroke.
 Heat stroke: Heat stroke is life-threatening. The victim's
temperature control system, which produces sweating to cool the body, stops working. The body temperature can rise so high that brain damage and death may result if the body is not cooled quickly.
 Sunstroke: Another term for heat stroke.

If a Heat Wave Is Predicted or Happening

 Slow down. Avoid strenuous activity. If you must do strenuous activity, do it during the coolest part of the day, which is usually in the morning between 4:00 a.m. and 7:00 a.m.
 Stay indoors as much as possible. If air conditioning is not available, stay on the lowest floor, out of the sunshine. Try to go to a public building with air conditioning each day for several hours. Remember, electric fans do not cool the air, but they do help sweat evaporate, which cools your body.
 Wear lightweight, light-colored clothing. Light colors will reflect away some of the sun's energy.
 Drink plenty of water regularly and often. Your body needs water to keep cool.
 Drink plenty of fluids even if you do not feel thirsty.
 Water is the safest liquid to drink during heat emergencies. Avoid drinks with alcohol or caffeine in them. They can make you feel good briefly, but make the heat's effects on your body worse. This is especially true about beer, which dehydrates the body.
 Eat small meals and eat more often. Avoid foods that are high in
protein, which increase metabolic heat.
 Avoid using salt tablets unless directed to do so by a physician.

Signals of Heat Emergencies

 Heat exhaustion: Cool, moist, pale, or flushed skin; heavy sweating; headache; nausea or vomiting; dizziness; and exhaustion. Body temperature will be near normal.
 Heat stroke: Hot, red skin; changes in consciousness; rapid, weak pulse; and rapid, shallow breathing. Body temperature can be very high-- as high as 105 degrees F. If the person was sweating from heavy work or exercise, skin may be wet; otherwise, it will feel dry.

Treatment of Heat Emergencies

 Heat cramps: Get the person to a cooler place and have him or her rest in a comfortable position. Lightly stretch the affected muscle and replenish fluids. Give a half glass of cool water every 15 minutes. Do not give liquids with alcohol or caffeine in them, as they can make conditions worse.
 Heat exhaustion: Get the person out of the heat and into a cooler place. Remove or loosen tight clothing and apply cool, wet cloths, such as towels or sheets. If the person is conscious, give cool water to drink. Make sure the person drinks slowly. Give a half glass of cool water every 15 minutes. Do not give liquids that contain alcohol or caffeine. Let the victim rest in a comfortable position, and watch carefully for changes in his or her condition.
 Heat stroke: Heat stroke is a life-threatening situation. Help is needed fast. Call 9-1-1 or your local emergency number. Move the person to a cooler place. Quickly cool the body. Immerse victim in a cool bath, or wrap wet sheets around the body and fan it. Watch for signals of breathing problems. Keep the person lying down and continue to cool the body any way you can. If the victim refuses water or is vomiting or there are changes in the level of consciousness, do not give anything to eat or drink.

Courtesy American Red Cross
____________________________________

June 14, 2005
Autism

Today's Message is from Doug Thompson (a Houston Albemarle employee).

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Ask yourself these five questions about any baby or young child that you
know -
1) Does the baby respond to his or her name when called by the caregiver?
2) Does the young child engage in "joint attention"?
3) Does the child imitate others?
4) Does the child respond emotionally to others?
5) Does the baby engage in pretend play?

MORE DETAILS

Five Early Signs of Autism
from The Exceptional Parent - December 6, 2002
For more articles visit www.bridges4kids.org.

All parents should consider these "Big Five" if they suspect that their child may have autism.

1) Does the baby respond to his or her name when called by the caregiver? Within the first few months of life, babies respond to their own name by orienting toward the person who called them. Typical babies are very responsive to the voices of familiar people, and often respond with smiles and looks.

In contrast, infants later diagnosed with autism often fail to respond to their own name. That is, when called by name, they tend to turn and look at the person only about 20% of the time as found- in the videotaped one year-old birthday parties of children with autism. They also are often selectively responsive to sounds. They may ignore some sounds and respond to others that are of the same loudness. Thus, they may fail to respond to their parent calling their name, but immediately respond to the television being turned on. It is not unusual for parents to suspect their child has a hearing loss.

2) Does the young child engage in "joint attention"? Near the end of the first year of life, most infants begin to join with their caregivers in looking at the same object or event. To aid in this process of "joint attention," typical infants begin to shift their gaze from toys to people, follow other's points, monitor the gaze of others, point to objects or events to share interest, and show toys to others. These behaviors have a distinct sharing quality to them. For example, the young infant may point to an airplane flying over head, and look to the parent, as if to say, "do you see that!"

In contrast, young children with autism have particular difficulties in jointly attending with others. They rarely follow another's points, do not often shift their gaze back and forth from objects to people, and do not seem to share "being with" the caregiver as they watch and talk about objects, people, or events. They also tend not to "show" a toy to the parent.

3) Does the child imitate others? Typical infants are mimics. Very young infants can imitate facial movements (e.g., sticking out their tongue). As early as 8-10 months, mothers and infants say the same sounds one after another, or clap or make other movements. Indeed, imitation is a major part of such common infant games as pat-a-cake and So Big ("How big is baby? Soooo big!" as infant raises hands to sky).

Young children with autism, however, less often imitate others. They show less imitation of body and facial movements (waving, making faces, playing infant games), and less imitation with objects.

4) Does the child respond emotionally to others? Typical infants are socially responsive to others. They smile when others smile at them, and they initiate smiles and laughs when playing with toys and others. When typical infants observe another child crying, they may cry themselves, or looked concerned. Somewhat older infants may crawl near the person, pat, or in other ways offer comfort. These latter behaviors are suggestive of empathy and are commonly observed among children in the second year of life.

In contrast, children with autism may seem unaware of the emotions of others. They may not take notice of the social smiles of others, and thus may not look and smile in response to other's smiles. They also may ignore the distress of others. Several researchers have now shown that when an adult feigns pain and distress after hitting herself with a toy, or banging her knee, young children with autism are less likely to look at the adult, or show facial concern.

5) Does the baby engage in pretend play? Someone once noted that "play is the work of children." Young children love to pretend-to be a mother, father, or baby, to be a firefighter or police officer. Although children start to play with toys around six months or so, play does not take on a pretend quality until the end of the first year. Their first actions may involve pretending to feed themselves, their mother or a doll, brush the doll's hair, or wipe the doll's nose. Nearer their second birthday, children engage in truly imaginative play as dolls may take on human qualities of talking or engaging in household routines. Children may pretend that a sponge is a piece of food, a block is a hat, or a plastic bowl is a swimming pool that contains water.

In contrast, the play of children with autism may be lacking in several ways. The young child may not be interested in objects at all, paying more attention to the movement of his hands, or a piece of string. If interested in toys, only certain ones may catch his interest, and these may be used in a repetitive way that is not consistent with how most children would play with the toy. They may be more interested in turning a toy car upside down and spinning the wheels than pushing the car back and forth. Overall, pretend qualities are nearly absent in the play of children with autism under 2 years of age.

It is important to note that in each of the 5 areas we have flagged, we are most concerned with behaviors that are absent or occur at very low rates. The absence of certain behaviors may be more difficult to pinpoint than the presence of atypical behaviors. But concerns in any of the above areas should prompt a parent to investigate screening their child for autism. Several screening measures are now available, and information from the screener will help to determine if the parent should pursue further evaluations. If the parent is convinced their child has autism, then they should seek an evaluation with an expert in autism. Most likely, this evaluation will involve an interview with the parents to obtain a complete developmental history of the child, and direct observations of the child in different situations.

Thank you for visiting http://www.bridges4kids.org/ .

____________________________________

June 13, 2005
Prepared by BRT employee Rick Jones

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"Safety tailgates at home are vital"

We moved to a busy street which did not have sidewalks when our twins were 5 years old. We stressed to the twins that since we no longer had sidewalks, they must ride their bikes on the far right side of the road. They soon made a new friend a block over from our house. The three kids were rounding the corner on their bikes when a small pickup truck came zipping through the intersection at maybe 30 mph. Our twins stayed next to the curb as they made the turn, but their friend was in the middle of the street. He & his bike were hit by the front grill of the truck and thrown onto a neighbor's lawn. He was in a coma for several days, but somehow, had no broken bones. We continued to give "safety tailgates" to the twins as they progressed from riding bikes to driving cars. They have been in a total of 3 auto wrecks in which their vehicles were totaled. They had their seat belts on eact time and were not hurt.
____________________________________

June 10, 2005
Safety from the Heart Prepared by Baton Rouge Tower Employee, Joe Sanders

Stay Out of Hot Water!

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Several years ago a friend and coworker was taking a bath at her home. While in the tub, she was adding more hot water from the faucet. As she was shutting off the valve, it malfunctioned and the valve stem unscrewed spraying her with hot scalding water. The result was second degree burns to her legs that, in addition to being quite painful, were serious enough for her to lose 10 work days. We do not normally think about such high temperatures from bath water. But, did you know that 124(superscript: o) F water causes burns in 3 minutes, 140(superscript: o) F causes burns in 3 seconds, and 158(superscript: o) F causes burns in 1 second. These temperatures are easily within the range of many hot water heaters.

Recommendation: Check and Adjust Water Temperature to 115 F
____________________________________

June 10, 2005

Today Safety From the Heart message is from Marie Rast.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Snakes

How can I tell the difference between poisonous and non-poisonous snakes?
There are only 4 species of poisonous snakes in North America; cottonmouth water moccasin, rattlesnake, copperhead and coral snake. Learn to identify these snakes from photos, and you can safely assume that all other snakes you see in North America are non-poisonous. Unfortunately for us in southeastern South Carolina, most of them are found where we are.

What should I do if a poisonous snake bites me?
Most methods of self-treatment are now deemed to cause more harm than good. The best thing to do is remain calm and seek professional medical care as soon as possible. Going into shock is probably as dangerous as the actual bite.

How dangerous are bites from poisonous snakes?
Small children are in more danger than adults because the venom is more concentrated in their smaller body mass. It also depends on how much venom is received. Everyone who is injected with venom should receive medical treatment. However, only 10 - 15 people die each year from snake bites in North America; many more people are killed by bees and lightning.

If I'm bitten by a poisonous snake, should I kill it and take it with me to the hospital for identification?
No, once you get to the hospital a simple blood test can determine what kind of venom is in your system. Emergency room staffs rightfully take a very dim view of bringing snakes (alive or dead) into their emergency room.

Do rattlesnakes always rattle to warn us?
They usually do, but not always. The latest thinking is, they rattle when two conditions exist; they are frightened and they think they will be seen. If they are secure in their camouflage, they probably won't rattle.

Can snakes hear?
No. Regardless of what you may have heard about making noise to warn snakes of your approach or presence, they are completely deaf and live in a silent world. However, they can pick up small, minute ground vibrations of other creatures (including us) moving in their immediate area. It's one way they avoid danger and enemies. They also use this ability to locate prey.

Are snakes really afraid of us?
Absolutely. They live in a world of eat or be eaten. They take one look at us and "think", "I can't eat this thing, but it's big enough to eat me". Consequently, they are very much afraid of us.

Can poisonous snakes regulate their venom when they bite?
Evidence indicates that mature rattlesnakes can regulate their venom. I haven't heard or read anything that indicates that the other 3 species of North American poisonous snakes do this. Rattlesnakes use their venom for hunting, and they are reluctant to "waste" perfectly good venom on humans.

Why does a snake flick out its tongue?
A snake's scent glands are located in its tongue. When it flicks out its tongue, it is "smelling" the air, usually because it is concerned about another creature moving in its immediate vicinity.

Does a snake have to be coiled in order to strike?
No. Coiling is a defensive posture that helps it see better. It probably also makes the snake feel more sure when it is frightened; kind of a "circle the wagons" strategy.

From what distance can snakes strike?
They can strike about 2/3 of their body length. In other words, a snake that is 3 feet long can strike from a distance of about 2 feet. However, I usually give all poisonous snakes a wide berth; at least 15 feet.

How fast can a snake strike?
About as fast as you can move your arm.

Will non-poisonous snakes bite?
Yes, they will bite if they are threatened or cornered. Though their bites are not normally considered life threatening, they can be extremely painful and may cause bleeding, infection and scarring.

Are snakes aggressive?
Snakes are individuals, just like people. Some are more aggressive than others. Concerning aggressiveness according to species, I've never seen a non-poisonous snake do anything other than try to get away unless it was cornered or attacked. Concerning the poisonous species, I'd rate the cottonmouth moccasin the most aggressive, followed by the rattlesnake, then the copperhead. The coral snake is not considered to be aggressive at all.

What are "pit vipers"?
Pit vipers (Viperids) have a small heat sensor (or "pit") on each side of the head between the eye and nostril. This pit is used to locate warm-blooded prey. It acts like an infrared heat detector. However, the pit doesn't accurately tell them the size of their prey. Unfortunately, snakes don't see well at night, and as a result we could be mistaken for prey at night. Three of the four North American poisonous snake species are pit vipers; cottonmouth, rattlesnake and copperhead.

Can the age of a rattlesnake be determined by the number of its rattles?
Not really; a new rattle is added each time a rattlesnake loses its skin, which could be anywhere from 2 to 4 times per year.

Can we eat snakes?
All snakes are edible; even the poisonous ones (the venom sacs are located directly behind the head, removing the head removes the venom sacs). The meat is fairly good but very bony, and yes they do taste a bit like chicken. Our forefathers probably ate more snakes than we care to think about.

Can a "dead" snake bite me?
From our perspective, it can take an awfully long time for a snake to die, even after it receives an obviously fatal injury (like having its head severed from its body). I once shot and killed a large rattlesnake that had been under my back porch. I removed the head with a large knife and buried it. Several minutes later when I walked past the headless body of the snake, it tried to strike at my leg. If I hadn't seen this with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it (Brawny also witnessed its repeated, headless "strikes"). The snake didn't stop moving completely for over an hour. I also heard of an incident where a man killed a snake, removed its head and threw the head away. However, 2 children retrieved it a few minutes later and started throwing it back and forth between them. One of the children was bitten on the hand (with venom injected) and had to be hospitalized. Give all "dead" snakes a wide berth, they may not be quite as dead as they first appear.

How do snakes reproduce?
When the female is fertile, she leaves a scent on the ground as she moves around. The male uses this scent trail to locate the female. The snakes intertwine, and fertilization occurs internally.

Do snakes lay eggs, or bear their young alive?
Some snakes lay eggs; others bear their young alive, it depends on the species. Most pit vipers bear their young alive. There is no such thing as a "mother" snake. After the eggs are deposited (usually in a rotting log) or the baby snakes are born, the female's responsibility ends.

Can snakes bite while they are underwater?
Yes, they can open their mouths and bite while underwater just like we can. Incidentally, rattlesnakes are excellent swimmers.

Do snakes go blind when they shed their skin?
They don't go blind, but their vision becomes cloudy and impaired just before they shed their skin. During this time, they are more dependent on their other senses.

Can snakes regulate their body temperature?
No, they can't; they are "cold blooded". It's why they aren't seen during cold weather (they hibernate underground), and why they must find shade on a hot day. Extreme temperatures can kill them.

What do snakes eat?
Snakes eat worms, insects, lizards, small mammals, birds, eggs, frogs, fish and other snakes. They swallow their food whole. All snakes are carnivores.

Are snakes beneficial?
They are good at controlling rodents. Farmers know this, and generally like to have non-poisonous species around. If you've ever had a good night's sleep in a trail shelter and weren't plagued by mice, it is probably because snakes are nearby.


Tips On Avoiding Snakes
A person always has to go to a snake in order to be bitten. A snake will not come to you to bite. Taking a little care where you put your hands and feet when you are in snake country will greatly reduce your chances of an encounter.

1. Be careful when gathering firewood, making sure that you don't pick up a snake with the wood.

2. Never step over a log. Step on it first and then over?because you never know what might be lying along the log on the other side.

3. Be careful when looking for a shady spot to have lunch on a hot day. A snake may have found the same spot before you did.

4. If you hear a rattlesnake rattling, try to locate the snake (or at least its general location) before making a mad dash. Trying to run from a snake when you don't know where it is can put you closer to it, rather than farther away.

5. When selecting a spot to dig a hole to dispose of body waste, take a hiking stick with you. Move the stick around on the ground in front of you as you walk, to make sure there are no unwelcome visitors in your path. Be especially careful at night, and take a flashlight with you.

6. If you see one snake, quickly take a look around. There may be more than one, and you don't want to run into the path of Snake B while you are making your getaway from Snake A.
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ.
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Davou Bulle, his wife, and their 10 children each climbed into the van, exhausted from another full day of work on their family’s farm. He started to pull away but was soon jarred to attention by the sound of gunshots hitting the tires. They were being ambushed because of his faith!

The Muslim attackers soon aimed their weapons at the driver, in hopes to first kill the Christian “infidel” then kill his entire family. In an attempt to protect his father, son Gyan lunged at the bullets to shield him, but the bullets found their way to their intended target, killing Davou. Gyan trying to help his father took 14 bullets during the ambush. Davou’s wife Mary was hit in the eye.

Mary was taken into surgery immediately. She lost one of her eyes as a result of the attack. Son Gyan was also operated on, removing all 14 bullets from his body, miraculously he survived! Davou left behind a wife and 10 children.

More than 10,000 Christians have been killed since 1999 in Nigeria and nearly 1,000 homes and churches have been burned down by Muslim radicals-all because of their faith in Jesus Christ. VOM has opened up a center in Jos, Nigeria for the purpose of helping Christian widows who have lost their husbands at the hands of Muslim fanatics. This center will help these widows develop a trade in sewing or computers so they can support themselves and their children who were left behind.

If you are not currently receiving The Voice of the Martyrs monthly newsletter, please take this special opportunity to request your free subscription. Simply click on the link below to subscribe. The award-winning newsletter reveals the truth on today’s persecution of Christian, highlights some of the most courageous stories you will ever read, and give practical ways you can be involved. Don’t let those like Mary suffer in silence. Subscribe to The Voice of the Martyrs monthly newsletter today.

http://etools.780net.com/a/jgroup/bg_wwwpersecutioncom_afa-email05_9.html
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TGIF-Today God Is First


Learning To Stand
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Friday, June 17, 2005
by Os Hillman

..."Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today...." ~ Exodus 14:13

The Israelites had just left 400 years of slavery in Egypt. They had fled to the desert, but they had come to a dead end at the Red Sea. Word reached them that Pharaoh had changed his mind. He was sending his troops to recapture the Israelites. They cried out to their leader Moses, complaining that he had brought them that far only to die in the desert.

Learning when to move and when to stand is the greatest challenge for a workplace believer. We are trained for action. We are not trained to sit idly and wait. We are trained to solve problems, not wait for them to resolve themselves. However, God says there are times to wait. We are to wait until He says go. If we go before He says go, we likely will make our situation worse. If the Israelites had attempted to cross the Red Sea before it parted, they would have drowned. If they had fled north to try to avoid the Egyptians, God would not have moved in a miraculous way. God cannot work on our behalf if we continually try to solve our problem when He has instructed us to stand still. Standing still is sometimes the greatest action we can do, although it is the most difficult thing to do in the Christian walk.

Stand still when He says stand and see the deliverance of the Lord.
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Receiving Your Inheritance
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Thursday, June 16, 2005
by Os Hillman

But the Danites had difficulty taking possession of their territory, so they went up and attacked Leshem, took it, put it to the sword and occupied it.... ~ Joshua 19:47

What is the spiritual inheritance God has reserved for you? When God told the Israelites they were going to receive the Promised Land, it was not given to them on a silver platter. In fact, they would encounter 39 battles in taking the land God promised to them. It took a joint effort between God and the Israelites to engage and battle the enemy that maintained control of the land.

God has given you and me a spiritual inheritance that must be won in the heavenlies. A dear friend and mentor once counseled me after watching my life over a period and said, "The Lord has given you a spiritual inheritance. That inheritance lies in relationships, and because it lies in relationships, that is the place the enemy has attacked you most. The enemy always attacks us in the area where we are to receive our inheritance. You must walk in faithfulness and obedience to His righteousness in how you deal with relationships." These were words of wisdom that have since guided my path. The Lord has proven these words to be true.

What is the spiritual inheritance He has reserved for you? What areas of your inheritance must you take possession of? The enemy of your soul does not want you to take possession. Put on your armor and begin walking in obedience into the areas God has called you to possess.

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When God Speaks
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Wednesday, June 15, 2005
by Os Hillman

..."The Lord is with you, mighty warrior." ~ Judges 6:12

Has God ever spoken directly to you in such a way that you knew that it was actually His voice speaking to you specifically? I don't mean just an appropriate verse of Scripture, or a circumstance that seemed probable that it was God. I am talking about a situation that you know that you know it was the God of the universe speaking directly to you.

In the book Experiencing God, authors Henry Blackaby and Claude King say that one of seven important steps to experiencing God in everyday life is how God speaks to us. "God speaks by the Holy Spirit through the Bible, prayer, circumstances, and the church to reveal Himself, His purposes, and His ways." [Henry Blackaby and Claude King, Experiencing God (Nashville, Tennessee: LifeWay Press, 1990), 225]
You can examine the life of every major character in the Bible and see this principle expressed in the way God worked in each of their lives.

One of the ways God speaks is through others. God often used others to speak to individuals, especially in the Old Testament when God often spoke through the prophets. This is still one of the ways He speaks today.

Several years ago I was in a church on the west coast that I had never been in before. I was in the midst of a tremendous trial. Three people prayed for me, and as they did, they began to describe a picture that was reflective of my life since I was a young Christian. It was a very accurate picture of my life. About a year later a man from Virginia prayed with me in my office. After our prayer time, he began to describe what he had just seen as a picture of my life. It was the same picture that had been described a year earlier. A year after that I was on a trip overseas and a man from England whom I had never met before came to me. He and I had a time of prayer together, and at the end of our prayer time he described a picture he had just seen in his mind while we were praying. Again, it was the same type of picture as the two previous encounters. Only this time, one element was added that was important for me to know related to what God was doing in my life at that time. When God chooses to speak into our lives through others, it can be an incredible blessing. He speaks in many ways. This is just one of them.

God desires to encourage us by speaking to us. He does this in many ways. The next time someone speaks into your life, prayerfully consider whether God is using that person to convey something important He wants you to know.

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Perception Is Not Reality
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Tuesday, June 14, 2005
by Os Hillman

The lions may roar and growl, yet the teeth of the great lions are broken. ~ Job 4:10

In the advertising business we often say that "perception is reality" for the person who views our advertising message. It does not matter whether the audience believes the message to be true, only that they perceive it to be true. Their actions will be the same whether they believe it or only perceive it.

The enemy of our souls is very good at this game. He may bring on us what we perceive to be true when it is a lie. It may appear that there is no way around a situation. He may bring great fear on us. When we buy into his lie, we believe only what we have chosen to perceive to be true. It usually has no basis of truth. Such was the case when Peter looked on the waters during a night boat journey with the other disciples. At first glance, he and the disciples screamed with fear, thinking that what they saw was a ghost. It was actually Jesus.

Satan's name means "accuser." He travels to and fro to accuse the brethren. He brings an impressive front to all he does, yet behind that front is a weak, toothless lion with a destination that has already been prepared in the great abyss. He knows his destination, but he wants to bring as many with him as possible; so he often has a big roar, but little bite.

The next time some event comes into your life that creates fear and trembling, first determine the source. Look past the emotions and evaluate the situation in light of God's Word. Perception is not always reality.

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Humility in Relationships
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Monday, June 13, 2005
by Os Hillman

All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." ~ 1 Peter 5:5b

I'll never forget the first time I discovered what a feeling was. It was in my early forties. Surely not! …you may be thinking. Yes, it is true. Since then, I have discovered many men still live in this condition. It took an older mentor to help me understand the difference between information and a feeling. Wives are frustrated because their husbands share information, but not their feelings. They want to know what is going on inside their man. The fact is, most men have not been taught to identify feelings, much less how to share them. It is something that men must learn to do because it is not a natural trait. If they do share their feelings, society often portrays them as weak. No man willingly wants to be portrayed as weak.

In order to become an effective friend and leader, one must learn to be vulnerable with others and develop an ability to share feelings. It is a vital step to becoming a real person with whom others can connect emotionally. This is not easy to do if your parents did not teach you to share your emotional life with others. Emotional vulnerability is especially hard for men. Author Dr. Larry Crabb states,

Men who as boys felt neglected by their dads often remain distant from their own children. The sins of fathers are passed on to children, often through the dynamic of self-protection. It hurts to be neglected, and it creates questions about our value to others. So to avoid feeling the sting of further rejection, we refuse to give that part of ourselves we fear might once again be received with indifference. When our approach to life revolves around discipline, commitment, and knowledge [which the Greek influence teaches us] but runs from feeling the hurt of unmet longings that come from a lack of deeper relationships, then our efforts to love will be marked more by required action than by liberating passion. We will be known as reliable, but not involved. Honest friends will report that they enjoy being with us, but have trouble feeling close. Even our best friends (including spouses) will feel guarded around us, a little tense and vaguely distant. It's not uncommon for Christian leaders to have no real friends. [Larry Crabb, Inside Out (Colorado Springs, Colorado: Navpress, n.d.), 98-99.]

If this describes you, why not begin on a new journey of opening up your life to others in a way that others can see who you really are? It might be scary at first, but as you grow in this area, you will find new freedom in your life. Then, others will more readily connect with you.
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Copyright 2005. www.MarketplaceLeaders.org
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To contact Os Hillman, request reprint permission, or to book Os to speak in your town write to os@marketplaceleaders.org. Marketplace Leaders Website: http://www.marketplaceleaders.org/ Copyright 2005
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Please recommend this TGIF daily devotional to everyone interested in applying their faith to their worklife. Tell them to subscribe at http://www.TodayGodIsFirst.com

Os Hillman Copyright 2005
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Verse of the Day

… and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Eph 6:17b

Think you’re ready for the swordsmith? Before we get there, tell me, what do you think your sword will look like? Uh-h. You think so? That big? Are you sure you can handle such a massive bit of steel? You do? Let me see you flex your arm muscles. Not bad, but do you know how much a four-foot long sword weighs? I know; it didn’t look that hard to use in Brave Heart. Then again, forgive me, but you’re no Mel Gibson either.

Do you remember what I told you about your shield? That’s right; it was big for defensive purposes. Well, your sword will surprise you. It is not big. No, really. Compared to what you had envisioned, your sword will be not much larger than a dagger. It is the same type of sword the soldiers were carrying when they arrested Jesus in the Garden … and the same kind of sword that Peter wielded as he went on the offense. Peter was a fisherman, not a soldier. He was trained to use a large knife to cut ropes and kill fish. He, as big and brawny as he was, was not trained or prepared to use a soldier’s broadsword. He carried a smaller version that could be worn under the cloak. After all, it would have looked a bit strange for a fisherman in Jesus’ presence to be dragging a massive sword to a garden!

Ah, here we are. This isn’t quite as dirty as the blacksmith’s is it? Sword making has had a long tradition, and the sword the King has commissioned for you has taken hundreds of years to perfect. Look at these masterpieces! Such magnificent work. Each sword is perfect. There is not a flaw in them anywhere. Note the simplicity of design. Every curve, every twist, every detail is designed with one thing in mind: your protection and skillful deployment. Now the moment you have been waiting for …

Here is your sword. Look at the detail. And here, etched on the blade is your favorite scripture verses … the ones that mean so much to you. But the most prominent verse is this one: “For God so loved,” and there is your name, “that He gave His only begotten Son that,” and there is your name again! “believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” That is there for your reassurance. God loves YOU! God redeemed YOU! The Father adopted YOU! Every time you draw your sword, these words will flash before your eyes. Every time you clean your sword, you fingers will caress these words. They will never leave you wanting for reassurance.

Feels nice doesn’t it? It fits your hands perfectly. This swordsmith does fantastic work. Your sword is used both defensively and offensively. You must learn to handle it correctly because if you don’t, you can do serious harm with it. It is not heavy, so you don’t use it as a hammer or bat to beat someone. It is very sharp, so you must be careful that you don’t use it improperly lest you cut someone to shreds with it. In some ways it is more like a scalpel than a sword. As a matter of fact, the word we translate “sword” or in this case “small sword” is used by the Greeks to indicate a surgeon’s knife. As you learn to use it, you will be able to skillfully excise disease in your brothers as easily as you can send a demon back to the pit!

Yes, I know that is a lot to expect … and you’re a novice at swordplay. However, if you will take the time to study your sword, if you learn to use it well, you can definitely use it for good. No, you don’t have to go to Sword University to do that. I know a janitor who uses it quite effectively. It takes time and dedication to learn and practice, but you can master the skills necessary. The captains of your unit will help train you in its use. Before long, you will be teaching others the skills you have learned … at the same time that you are learning new ones! No, really! You will be teaching others in sword drills. You can become a sword master.

Now, let’s go practice.

Harley
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And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Eph 6:17

Helmet Hamlet is just a short hop by motor coach. Here, let’s just hop on this bus for the short trip. There’s a seat that we can sit in together. Ah! How’s the shoes feel? As you can tell, this bus line is designed for Christian soldiers. I see you found the shield rack. Neat, huh?

Now, about the helmet … what’s that? Oh, those racks are for swords. I know. You want to go to the sword shop, but that will have to wait. We are on the way to Helmet Hamlet now and the sword shop is in the other direction. Can we turn around? You really are anxious for the sword, aren’t you? Like I used to tell my kids, you’ll just have to wait, so be patient. We’ll get there in due season.

Now, as I was saying, about the helmet, you’ll find that helmets create really bad hair-days! Well, really they do, but the alternative is rather distasteful, so we will just have to get used to the hair problem. Helmets are an essential part of the defensive armor we are getting for you. It protects the … yes, that’s right! It protects the head. Here, look at my helmet.

See how snugly it fits around my head? That keeps it in place. If it were too loose, it would spin around and open vulnerable places to attack … it would also have a tendency to block my vision! However, it is not so snug as to be unbearable. There is “breathing room” inside. As you can see, the inside is quite nicely padded to make it comfortable. This is the custom fit part of the headgear. Just like a football helmet, most of them are about the same size. It is the lining and the attachments that make it unique to the wearer. One of the funniest things I think I have ever seen in a football game is one of those little place-kickers wearing an absolutely huge helmet! I honestly think some of them could dance the Rumba inside their head gear!

Here, hold my helmet for a minute. See how light it is? That is part of the beauty of it. The material is light, but strong. Yes, much like the shield, but of a different material all together. The total package protects my noggin from fatal blows, glancing blows, and the stray arrow that manages to get past the shield. As long as I keep it in place, my head it totally protected.

Why is it called the helmet of salvation? Some say that the helmet IS your salvation, but that is reading too much into the name. Actually, SALVATION is your helmet. Sure, it’s a bit confusing, so let me illustrate. Your salvation, the knowledge that God has called you, adopted you, made you into who you are … yes, IN CHRIST … is your protection in close combat. As long as you remember this information … and believe it … nothing can penetrate you thoughts, your soul, in order to destroy it.

Let’s say someone suggests that your adoption is faked. That would be earth shattering, wouldn’t it? “What do you mean? Are you saying that I am not really a son of God? That my salvation isn’t real?” If I were to ponder that thought and let it eat into my being, I could be really shaken spiritually. While I may not loose my salvation, it certainly would tend to make me ineffective as a soldier. We might think like this: “I’m not moving a step further until I know that I am God’s child. I won’t talk to anyone. I won’t listen to anyone. I’ll just sit here and wait for some sign from on high.” Meanwhile the battle rages on … and once less soldier is involved in the fight … and one hole has been created in the battlements … and the enemy can sneak through that hole and do serious damage to the kingdom; perhaps even costing the lives of the lost souls we were sent to enlist into the family of God!

Ah, here we are! Are you ready for a helmet? I thought you would be by now. We’ll visit the sword makers next. I think he is just putting the finishing touches on the one the King ordered for you!

Harley
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… in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Eph 6:16

You’re starting to look like a real soldier … err, I don’t mean to say that you AREN’T a real soldier, but you ARE beginning to look like you are prepared for battle. Ok. I’ll stop while I’m behind, but you are looking spiffy in the new shoes, breastplate, and belt. The blacksmith’s place is just ahead. I’ll warn you, the place is a bit dirty looking, but he has great shields. I know the King has ordered on just for you.

Ah, here we are. Take a look at all of this stuff. There are small shields used in hand-to-hand combat. See, they are worn on one forearm while the sword is wielded with the other hand. It gives great mobility and protection. Here, hold it for a minute. Looks good. What’s that? Oh, no, this is not your shield … you need a different one for the task God has for you. This shield is for the King’s Special Forces.

Here, this is the one the Captain of the hosts has for you. I know, it’s rather large. Yes, I can tell it won’t fit on the forearm like the other one. This is a defensive shield; perfect for what you need right now. Perhaps later you will enlist in a Special Forces unit and get one of those jazzier shields. Let me explain a bit about this shield.

Note that it looks a lot like a door. It has four corners and is big enough to hide behind. The unit you will join is an infantry unit. Everyone starts there, so don’t feel bad. This is the shield you will use to protect yourself. How’s that? What do you need protection from? You thought that was the job of the Holy Spirit? No, the Spirit’s job is to intercede for us, to pass on the Father’s instructions to us, and to empower us to do the work the Father has for us to do. See, this is a shield of faith. Note the metal that it is forged from. Though the shield is large, the weight is rather light yet very strong. It won’t stop everything, but it will do what is needed for you throughout your military career.

Faith is like that. As we begin to trust (that is what faith means) God more, we find that our protection grows stronger. We are less likely to fall into temptation. We are able to detect and deflect the attacks of the enemy. This particular shield is specially designed to protect us from fiery darts or arrows. These projectiles are thrown or shot at us from a distance. We can see them coming. We can hear them approaching. There is little surprise when they are coming our way. But that is when just one is coming. The enemy seldom attacks with one arrow, that would be snipping and though he does that, he is more likely to attack with a barrage hoping that one of the multitude of arrows will hit its mark and destroy us. How can that happen? It only happens one way: we step from behind our shield. We loose trust in God, or we think we can do it on our own and move into the open. Bad choice … but it happens to the best of us.

The strategy is this, when we begin our march into battle, we hold the shield in front of us. When the arrows begin to come, we crouch down behind our shield, tipping it backward over us. Even an arrow that is falling straight down cannot hit us that way. Then, and this is important, we hold this position until the Captain of the hosts tells us to leave our cover. It’s that simple … and that hard. It’s not easy waiting. Sometimes we begin to feel that the attack is over. Arrows have not come our way for a while so we raise our shields and stand up to take a peek. Wham! Right between the eyes … you’re dead. See what I mean? The Captain is impervious to the arrows. He has been struck down once and rose from the dead. The enemy can’t hit Him any more. He, riding His charger, sees all and through His Spirit directs the battle … both offensive and defensive. Learn to listen to Him. Learn to obey Him. Then you will be okay throughout the battle.

Do you understand what I’m saying? Good. Don’t forget this word of advice, and you will do fine.

Next up, Helmet Hamlet, a small village on the edge of town that specializes in … you guessed it, helmets!

Harley
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c. 2005 Harley E. Hudson

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Activities and Events of Interest
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The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Sgt. First Class Victor H. Cervantes, 27, of Stockton, Calif., died June 10 in Orgun-e, Afghanistan, when he came under small arms fire while on patrol. Cervantes was assigned to the Army's 1st Battalion, 7th Special Forces Group (Airborne), Fort Bragg, N.C.
The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died on June 11 in Owesat Village, Iraq, when their armored personnel carrier was hit by an improvised explosive device. Both soldiers were assigned to the Army National Guard's 150th Combat Engineer Battalion, 155th Brigade Combat Team, Lucedale, Miss. Killed were:
02. Sgt. Larry R. Arnold Sr., 46, of Carriere, Miss.
03. Spc. Terrance D. Lee Sr., 25, of Moss Point, Miss.
The Department of Defense announced the death of two Marines who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom.
04. Lance Cpl. Mario A. Castillo, 20, of Brownwood, Texas
05. Lance Cpl. Andrew J. Kilpela, 22, of Fowerville, Mich.
Both Marines died June 10 as a result of an explosion while conducting combat operations in Saqlawiyah, Iraq. They were assigned to 2nd Combat Engineer Battalion, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.
The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died June 11 in Al Taqaddum, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their military vehicle. Killed were:
06. Spc. Casey Byers, 22, of Schleswig, Iowa. Byers was assigned to the Army National Guard's 224th Engineer Battalion, Ottumwa, Iowa.
07. Sgt. 1st Class Neil A. Prince, 35, of Baltimore, Md. Prince was assigned to the Army's 2nd Battalion, 17th Field Artillery Regiment, 2nd Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division, Fort Carson, Colo.
08. Lance Cpl. John J. Mattek Jr., 24, of Stevens Point, Wis., died June 13 from wounds received as a result of an explosion while conducting combat operations against enemy forces in Al Anbar Province, Iraq, on June 8. He was assigned to the 2nd Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion, Regimental Combat Team-2, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.
09. Cpl. Stanley J. Lapinski, 35, of Las Vegas, Nev., died June 11 in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his military vehicle. Lapinski was assigned to the Army's 3rd Battalion, 7th Infantry Regiment, 3rd Infantry Division, Fort Stewart, Ga.
10. Sgt. David J. Murray, 23, of Clinton, La., died June 9 in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his military vehicle. Murray was assigned to the Army National Guard's 1088th Engineering Battalion, New Roads, La.
The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died on June 13 in Ramadi, Iraq, where their military vehicle came under a grenade attack while conducting combat operations. Both soldiers were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 17th Field Artillery Regiment, 2nd Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division, Fort Carson, Colo.
The soldiers are:
11. Sgt. Larry R. Kuhns Jr., 24, of Austintown, Ohio.
12. Spc. Anthony D. Kinslow, 21, of Westerville, Ohio.
13. Pfc. Joshua P. Klinger, 21, from Easton, Pa., died June 14 as a result of an explosion from an improvised explosive device while conducting combat operations against enemy forces near Fallujah, Iraq. He was assigned to 1st Battalion, 6th Marine Regiment, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.
The Department of Defense announced the death of four Marines who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom.
14. Lance Cpl. Jonathan R. Flores, 18, of San Antonio, Texas
15. Cpl. Jesse Jaime, 22, of Henderson, Nev.
16. Cpl. Tyler S. Trovillion, 23, of Richardson, Texas
17. Lance Cpl. Dion M. Whitley, 21, of Los Angeles, Calif.
All four Marines died June 15 when their vehicle hit an improvised explosive device while conducting combat operations near Ar Ramadi, Iraq. All four Marines were assigned to 1st Battalion, 5th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Pendleton, Calif. During Operation Iraqi Freedom, their unit was operating with the 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 2nd Infantry Division of the U.S. Army, which was attached to 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward).
18. Pfc. Michael R. Hayes, 29, of Morgantown, Ky., died June 14 in Baghdad, Iraq, where a rocket-propelled grenade hit his HMMWV while he was providing security cordon for an improvised explosive device found earlier. Hayes was assigned to the Army National Guard’s 617th Military Police Company, Richmond, Ky.
19. Sgt. Anthony G. Jones, 25, of Greenville, S.C., died June 14 in Baghdad, Iraq, where an improvised explosive device detonated near his military vehicle. Sgt. Jones was assigned to the 104th Transportation Company, 36th Engineer Group, 3rd Infantry Division (Mechanized), Fort Benning, Ga.
20. Petty Officer 2nd Class Cesar O. Baez, 37, of Pomona, Calif., died June 15, as a result of enemy small arms fire while conducting combat operations in al-Anbar province, Iraq. Baez was a Hospital Corpsman assigned to 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward).
21. Pfc. Nathan B. Clemons, 20, of Winchester, Tenn., died June 14 from wounds sustained when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle while conducting combat operations against enemy forces near Ar Rutbah, Iraq. He was assigned to the 2nd Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.
22. Lance Cpl. Chad B. Maynard, 19, of Montrose, Colo., died June 15 when his vehicle hit an improvised explosive device while conducting combat operations near Ar Ramadi, Iraq. He was assigned to 1st Battalion, 5th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Pendleton, Calif.
During Operation Iraqi Freedom, his unit was operating with the 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 2nd Infantry Division of the U.S. Army, which was attached to 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward).
23. Spc. Anthony S. Cometa, 21, of Las Vegas, Nev., died June 16 in Safwan, Kuwait, when his HMMWV rolled over. He was assigned to the Army National Guard's 1864th Transportation Company, 106th Transportation Battalion, Henderson, Nev.
24. Staff Sgt. Christopher N. Piper, 43, of Marblehead, Mass., died on June 16 at the Brooke Army Medical Center, Fort Sam Houston, Texas, from injuries sustained on June 3 when an improvised explosive device detonated near his military vehicle in Orgun-E, Afghanistan. He was assigned the 1st Battalion, 7th Special Forces Group, Fort Bragg, N.C.
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The Department of Defense POW/Missing Personnel Office (DPMO) announced today that the remains of two Army soldiers missing in action from World War II have been identified and returned to their families for burial.
They are Sgt. John T. Puckett, Wichita, Kan., and Pvt. Earnest E. Brown, Bristol, Va. Puckett will be buried tomorrow at the Ardennes American Cemetery, Neupre, Belgium. Brown was buried last week near Bristol, Va.
On Jan. 15, 1945, during the Battle of the Bulge, Puckett and Brown were searching for German soldiers in a wooded area near Elsenborn, Belgium. They were ambushed and came under intense enemy machine gun and mortar fire. Eyewitnesses indicated they were killed, but their bodies could not be recovered due to enemy activity.
Following the war, remains of American soldiers were recovered and identified, but not those of Puckett and Brown. Then in 1992, two Belgian nationals located and excavated an abandoned fighting position in the forest east of Elsenborn. They recovered remains and other evidence and turned them over to U.S. authorities in Europe.
Scientists of the Joint POW/MIA Accounting Command and the Armed Forces DNA Identification Laboratory used mitochondrial DNA as one of the forensic tools to identify the remains as those of Puckett and Brown.
Of the 88,000 Americans missing in action from all conflicts, 78,000 are from World War II.

For additional information on the Defense Department’s mission to account for missing Americans, visit the DPMO Web site at http://www.dtic.mil/dpmo/ or call (703) 699-1169 .
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Remember that for every soldier killed in modern war, 10 are wounded. Don't forget to pray for them and their families.
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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Scheduled Activities
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Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 8 p.m. Monday - Friday. At noon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and at 7 p.m. Sunday at 914 N. Vine
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Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
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Columbia County Diabetes Support Group - Every third Monday, 7:00 p.m. room 222, Magnolia Hospital
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"Focus on the Family" with Dr. James Dobson weekday afternoons at 1 PM on KVMA am 630 it's a great show!
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MCC - Abraham Prayer - Sunday at 5:00 p.m and Wednesday from 11:30 am to 1:00 pm
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MCC - Early Morning Prayer - Monday - Friday, From 6:30 am to 8:00 am
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MCC - "Beth Moore" Video Class - Thursday nights at 5:45 pm
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MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets at 1051 Columbia 36 the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
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MCC - Firm Foundations Class, Sunday 9:30 to 10:15 a.m
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MCC - Meadow Brook Nursing Home Ministry Tuesday from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m
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MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
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MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
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MCC - Over comers: Fridays @ 7:00 p.m- Director, Traci Foster invites you to a 12 step Christian support program. For anyone with a life controlling problem. Child care is provided.
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Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
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Narcotics Anonymous 5-6 pm every Monday at 220 Pine street.
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TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 5 pm every Tuesday in the Magnolia Hospital break room.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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"Fight till you win!" - - Mark Brazee
"Bring 'em on!" - -President George W. Bush
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"If you can read this e-mail, thank a teacher. - - If you read it in English, thank a serviceman."
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed people can change the world; indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." - - Margaret Mead
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Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Mat 25:6-10 Neh 13:1-2 Psa 62:4-7 1 Cor 13:1-3
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

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